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Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - Craziness Domain - LOLZORMAONG | | | |
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Toxic in a sublime state of mind Level: 75 Posts: 177/2857 EXP: 3732709 For next: 94195 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 3 days Last activity: 8 hours |
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The following questions and answers were collated from SAT tests given to 16-year-old students. Don't laugh too hard - one of them could be president someday. Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky. Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election. Q: What are steroids? A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs. Q: What happens to your body as you age? A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental. Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow. Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g.,abdomen.) A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U. Q: What is the Fibula? A: A small lie. Q: What does "varicose" mean? A: Nearby. Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium. Q: Give the meaning of the term "Cesarean Section." A: The cesarean section is a district in Rome. Q: What is a seizure? A: A Roman emperor. Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport. Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas. Q: What does the word "benign" mean? A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight. Q: What is a turbine? A: Something an Arab wears on his head. These might not be real, but wow. |
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kitty Come on babe, pet the pussy ;) Level: 70 Posts: 133/2449 EXP: 2962406 For next: 53405 Since: 03-15-04 From: Scranton, PA, USA Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 3 hours |
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No, they aren't real. The entire SAT (to my recollection) was multiple choice. Therefore, it can't be for the SAT. It's too basic to be anything college-level. It sounds more like some middle-school exam | |||
Toxic in a sublime state of mind Level: 75 Posts: 181/2857 EXP: 3732709 For next: 94195 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 3 days Last activity: 8 hours |
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Oh well, I hadn't thought of that. Still funny, even just for the answers. |
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Old Zem Level: 27 Posts: 45/260 EXP: 102369 For next: 13790 Since: 03-16-04 Since last post: 213 days Last activity: 203 days |
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Yeah, I was gonna say that. Up to the "moon" thing, I thought they might have been plausible actual choices, but... no. I hate getting a goddamn canoeist in my drink. |
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Utilityman Like Like Level: 44 Posts: 123/813 EXP: 566605 For next: 44680 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 353 days Last activity: 4 days |
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I always keep a few condominiums nearby. | |||
Kwan Doesn't have a valid sized userpic. ||bass will be pissed :(((((((( Level: 50 Posts: 97/1137 EXP: 937111 For next: 10206 Since: 03-15-04 From: Durkadurkastan! Since last post: 22 days Last activity: 2 days |
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I think it's kinda dull, like those idiots on bash.org who make up a scenario just to be in there. Dumb. | |||
kitty Come on babe, pet the pussy ;) Level: 70 Posts: 136/2449 EXP: 2962406 For next: 53405 Since: 03-15-04 From: Scranton, PA, USA Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 3 hours |
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Shit, I just realized something... We're going to have a presidential election in about 8 months... OMG BUSH IS GONNA HAVE MORE KIDS ONO THE DOWNFALL OF MANKIND HAS BEGUN! |
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Kitten Yiffer Purple wand Furry moderator Vivent l'exp����¯�¿�½������©rience de signalisation d'amusement, ou bien ! Level: 135 Posts: 281/11162 EXP: 28824106 For next: 510899 Since: 03-15-04 From: Sweden Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 4 min. |
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I wonder how it would be if Acmlm board member did an test like that... | |||
Kefka Indefinitely Unbanned Level: 81 Posts: 159/3392 EXP: 4826208 For next: 166641 Since: 03-15-04 From: Pomona, CALIFORNIA BABY! Since last post: 4 hours Last activity: 4 hours |
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That's assuming Bush wins the election, Tom, right? | |||
kitty Come on babe, pet the pussy ;) Level: 70 Posts: 5138/2449 EXP: 2962406 For next: 53405 Since: 03-15-04 From: Scranton, PA, USA Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 3 hours |
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No, see, Bush IS the president (not much longer, THANK GOD, until Kerry is in office... w00t!), so if the president has an election.... AHHHH! I suppose an Asian MIGHT have problems with election and erection if he had a thick accent... |
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Iggy Koopa Red Cheep-cheep Level: 24 Posts: 1/214 EXP: 76441 For next: 1684 Since: 03-16-04 Since last post: 66 days Last activity: 12 days |
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This reminds me of some statewide test we had to take. In preparation for it, our teacher showed us what some answers would look like, and how they would be graded. The example question had to do with math and making tables, and somebody actually drew a table (not a chart-table thing). This was a real answer too. |
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