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Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - Story Forum - Pirates (rhymes with Socrates) | | | |
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Teddylot It was a dark and stormy night ... Level: 44 Posts: 12/851 EXP: 606742 For next: 4543 Since: 03-15-04 From: Not today. Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 8 hours |
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Okay, I've been meaning to post this story since my two year anniversary on the board, but I've been putting it off for a while. Unlike my previous stories, this one actually has a set plot | |||
Kirbynite Vire Holy Cucco! Level: 55 Posts: 47/1366 EXP: 1233975 For next: 80214 Since: 03-15-04 From: On some floating island, Earth Since last post: 14 hours Last activity: 4 hours |
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In a matter of seconds, the door to the Dreamlander household swung open. Kirbynite's visage greeted Teddylot. Apparantly, Kirbynite was prepared for Teddylot's latest idea. The pink Dreamlander was wearing a red bandana that covered the top of his head. There was a white cuff on each arm, which concealed all but the tip of his limbs. On his side, was a yellow pouch, which was held up by two brown belts. The belts were tied across his waist, and over his right arm. Kirbynite: Took you long enough, yarr. |
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Teddylot It was a dark and stormy night ... Level: 44 Posts: 22/851 EXP: 606742 For next: 4543 Since: 03-15-04 From: Not today. Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 8 hours |
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Teddylot: You read my mind, bucko, uh, I mean, scalliwag. Teddylot shuffled through his pocket and pulled out a yellow spotted bandana and an eyepatch. He quickly puts them on, then takes out his scabbard and waves it around nearly slicing through his quiet friend. Teddylot: It'll be a pirate's life for us. Zap: Will there be anybody else from your household joining us. Teddylot: *glare* Get into the spirit, ya billdrat! Zap: . . . arr. Meanwhile, some of the flyers should've been making there way all over the Earth. ((A selfless, self-promotional AHEM!)) |
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Utilityman Like Like Level: 44 Posts: 145/813 EXP: 566605 For next: 44680 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 353 days Last activity: 4 days |
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Far into the western wastes, in a small village upon the steppes, a turtle can be seen absentmindedly waving a wooden sword around. Troy: ...this thing needs more weight... if gramps would let me use his, well, THAT I could do some damage with... but whatever, it's not like I'd be able to put it to good use anyways... no dangerous, action-packed adventure around these parts, nosiree... *long pause* The wind picks up, slinging a pamphlet into Troy's face with a dull smack. He quickly pries it off and starts reading. Troy: Have you ever wanted to pirate? Blah blah pillage blah blah steal yak yak plunder yak yak etc. etc... well, maybe I'd like to plunder a nice big ADVENTURE! Or a big sword. Either or. Right on cue the entire village is cast into darkness as NGG eclipses it. Troy: ... *shrug* |
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MobleSprout Shyguy Level: 17 Posts: 3/91 EXP: 21215 For next: 3528 Since: 03-15-04 From: Philly Since last post: 26 days Last activity: 26 days |
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Somewhere, in the deep, dark, dank, distant, down-reaching (and any other of those synonyms) of the intertwining tunnels below the bustling town of Twoson, thousands of computer monitors blink and flash all about the dross of the dirt wall. There, below the lambent torches of brightened white, sat a green plant slouching in his cheap Drug Store swivel chair. He rocked back and forth, watching a distant monitor vacantly. Then, out of seemingly nowhere, he was quickly startled out of whatever inward state he was floating into by a bright ringing noise. "WARNING, WARNING, INCOMING HOSTILE OBJECT" wailed the normally-sweet and somber British voice. Sprout had rocketed across his panicked lab by now, but was resiliant enough to spring to his two feet and begin shouting commands into a wireless microphone clinging to his left leaf. "Alpha nine, c-ldos! Launch SAM sites!" he hollared into air. Then, from grassy knolls outside Twoson, metal abominations of metal twisted and contorted out from the obviously fake grass. They calculated and adjusted gears, and fired at whatever target had been fed to them. Needless to say, the red missles misses by a fathom and struck a local cult of weirdos in blue. Sprout blinked, but then shrugged. "At least it wasn't a total loss." Then, through his exaust pipe came a bright piece of paper dancing and fluttering in the air. The green leaf ripped it out of the air, and inspected it beneath a yellow, incandescent lights. He thought for a minute after reading it over. "You know, this may give me a chance to meet up with some of my old friends. Maybe I'll even see some people I haven't seen since two years ago! Count me in." He quickly twisted around, spouting off commands whilst pacing back and forth atop the gray, finished metal floor. Within minutes, he was inside the Sprout Cruiser and well on his way through a PLW (Planned-Route Wormhole) on to Neo Grape Gardens. Within the cockpit, his mindwave intepreter picked up on his request to transmit a voice cant directly to Dreamlander house/i] "Avast, ye dogs! I sure you'd be holdin' me on yer' crew 'o seawenches?" |
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Teddylot It was a dark and stormy night ... Level: 44 Posts: 24/851 EXP: 606742 For next: 4543 Since: 03-15-04 From: Not today. Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 8 hours |
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While Zap and Kirbynite were chatting, Teddylot wandered off towards the edge of the island, daydreaming about the wonderful times he'd soon have with his friend. Teddylot: Hm, looks like a quaint little town. Maybe there's some loser that can be part of my non-existant crew down there. Thinking absurdly. Teddylot took out a fishing pole from his pocket and pulled out a cinderblock which he carefully tied to the string's end. He then launched it over the side. The small crank spun around incessantly until their was a loud 'clang' coming from the land underneath. Teddylot: I've hit something! |
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Kirbynite Vire Holy Cucco! Level: 55 Posts: 50/1366 EXP: 1233975 For next: 80214 Since: 03-15-04 From: On some floating island, Earth Since last post: 14 hours Last activity: 4 hours |
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Kirbynite's eyes begin to wander. A voice seemed to have spoken to him. Unfortunately, he cannot spot the source. Kirbynite: .. Sprouty? *looks at Zap* I think someone else is coming this way to join the little pirating! As for someone in the house joining... Gooey was thinking about coming along... But he's still considering it... |
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Utilityman Like Like Level: 44 Posts: 148/813 EXP: 566605 For next: 44680 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 353 days Last activity: 4 days |
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The surface of the earth replied. Troy: F**K |
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Teddylot It was a dark and stormy night ... Level: 44 Posts: 25/851 EXP: 606742 For next: 4543 Since: 03-15-04 From: Not today. Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 8 hours |
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Zap: That's good news. I think Teddylot would be pretty disappointed if he had to use some of my robots to act as the crew. Teddylot: Now, to reel this sucker in. Teddylot took hold of the crank and tried to turn it with all his might, but couldn't. He tried everything he could think of (like throwing hand grenades over the side or giving the rod to an elephant) but nothing worked. Teddylot: This guy must weight a billion, gazillion pounds or something. *broods* I got it. Teddylot fiddled around in his pocket and pulled out a nice long ladder, yet not long enough to reach the Earth from where Neo Grape Gardens was overhead. What exactly goes on in his peanut of a mind pretty much baffles every genius who tries to figure it out. But maybe the world is better off without such understanding. Well, anyway, Teddylot ended up dropping the ladder as well. Hoping to provide some manner for the 'sucker' to reach NGG. |
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Utilityman Like Like Level: 44 Posts: 153/813 EXP: 566605 For next: 44680 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 353 days Last activity: 4 days |
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Troy: YOU'RE THE PIRATES OR SOMETHING, DON'T YOU HAVE A SHIP THAT WOULD GREATLY SPEED UP THIS PROCESS (edited by Ultimanium on 03-16-04 11:53 PM) |
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Mel (USER WAS TOTALLY AWESOME FOR THIS POST) Level: 47 Posts: 17/991 EXP: 762490 For next: 3713 Since: 03-15-04 From: secure tripcodes are for jerks Since last post: 17 min. Last activity: 16 min. |
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Meanwhile, on the open sea, a large metal ship was quietly chugging along. "ISM ZANTETSUKEN" was emblazoned on the side, and on the deck, in nothing but his boxers and a captain's hat, and a three-sided suntan mirror, lie the President of Japan, Melvin P. Gurio. Moments later, a pink-haired woman with an incredibly tiny bikini and inversely large breasts bent over, and handed him a drink. Girl: Your fruit punch, Mr. President. Melvin: It's good to be king. Uh, president. Is there a difference? |
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Utilityman Like Like Level: 44 Posts: 165/813 EXP: 566605 For next: 44680 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 353 days Last activity: 4 days |
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Troy muttered, rubbing his giant bruise while holding up the infinitely-tall ladder. Maybe he'd be able to get out of there before anyone realized that the falling stepladder had initially crushed a house in its atmospheric descent. He nudged it slightly, snapping out the back stand of it. He slowly placed it down, holding his sword in his teeth as he started to climb... (edited by Ultimanium on 03-17-04 05:26 PM) |
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MobleSprout Shyguy Level: 17 Posts: 4/91 EXP: 21215 For next: 3528 Since: 03-15-04 From: Philly Since last post: 26 days Last activity: 26 days |
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The same soothing British voice whispered to Sprout; "Sir, we're fast approaching Neo Grape Gardens. What's your course of action?" Sprouty scanned some blipping panels, calculating and crunching numbers within his head. "Steady as she goes, Elin." The computer processed his commands, but spoke up as if it were interrupted -- "Sir, I neglected to mention that our forward thrusters have imploded. The vessel is going to make a crash landing" The curses then eminating from the cockpit traveled through the void of space so quickly, it soon converted to light and shone upon the citizens of Saturn. Then, as a comet crashing towards the Earth, the Cruiser made a crash landing onto the brown fields of wheat, just missing the Dreamlander house by a hair. From the window next to the cockpit, a pink blob peeked out, and promptly shut the blinds as if nothing happened. Ppppsssshhhh, sighed the cockpit's door. Sprouty's body rolled out, and rested upon the grass. |
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Teddylot It was a dark and stormy night ... Level: 44 Posts: 30/851 EXP: 606742 For next: 4543 Since: 03-15-04 From: Not today. Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 8 hours |
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Teddylot: *looks over his shoulder* Crap, I was gonna use that gag on Kirb, just my luck. Teddylot waddled his way over to the crash site and looked blankly at the newcomer until he finally let out a bellowing 'WELCOME.' Naturally, he didn't seem to notice if anything was wrong with him. Over by the house, Zap was gritting his teeth, and desperately attempted to block Kirbynite's view of the wreck. |
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Utilityman Like Like Level: 44 Posts: 303/813 EXP: 566605 For next: 44680 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 353 days Last activity: 4 days |
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Troy: Holy mother of Ghandhi, how long did it take you to put this together? Everyone else busy, Troy was already at the bottom of the battleship, darting around as he surveyed it. He gave a firm knock to the hull. His hand burst through one of the planks and lodged in the resulting hole firmly. Troy: Not long enough. (edited by Utilityman on 03-25-04 03:58 AM) |
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Teddylot It was a dark and stormy night ... Level: 44 Posts: 42/851 EXP: 606742 For next: 4543 Since: 03-15-04 From: Not today. Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 8 hours |
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Zap had since entered the battle ship making last checks for supplies and other miscellaneous items and doodads. He eyed a room until he spotted Troy where he overheard him speaking. Zap: Sorry about that. That just happens to be one of the weaker parts of the ship, but I've adapted the entire of it with special nano-bots which I've developed. It's a bit hard to understand, but in super lamen's terms, they fix any damage done to the ship in a matter of seconds depending on the casualty. Right in front of their eyes, the hole disappeared. Zap: *smiles* Feel free to look around, but don't go around smashing things. (edited by Teddylot on 03-26-04 07:37 PM) |
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Utilityman Like Like Level: 44 Posts: 311/813 EXP: 566605 For next: 44680 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 353 days Last activity: 4 days |
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Troy: | |||
Teddylot It was a dark and stormy night ... Level: 44 Posts: 55/851 EXP: 606742 For next: 4543 Since: 03-15-04 From: Not today. Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 8 hours |
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Teddylot: *eyes Sprout* Oh well, he's dead. Losing interest, Teddylot decided to hunt for new recruits, since they still lacked a few. Right when he looked over the side however, a grappler flew up just past his head. Reaching its peak, it came back down and took a nice safehold. Minutes after the intrusion, up came the new recruit he was looking for. Platii: Arghish, I be Platii the Platypus, and I be here to pillage, thou scurvy dog. Teddylot: . . . Alright! But first, you'll have to fill out all these forms. *drops a mountain of forms onto the newcomer* Welcome! Platii: arg? *reads* 2 + 2? Teddylot: That's policy! Zap then came into view from the battle ship. Zap: *megaphone* The preparations are almost ready. Be prepared to board the ship. |
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Kirbynite Vire Holy Cucco! Level: 55 Posts: 82/1366 EXP: 1233975 For next: 80214 Since: 03-15-04 From: On some floating island, Earth Since last post: 14 hours Last activity: 4 hours |
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Kirbynite: ... My... crops!!! Chuchu: Oh no... He saw it... The Dreamlander's view was no longer blocked. He finally saw the damage that was laid out upon his crops. Slowly, Kirbynite stepped towards his unfortunate gardens. He looked to the side and saw a familar green plant. Kirbynite: I wasn't growing this... Hey! It's Sprouty! *walks over and shakes Sprout* So, ya wanna be a pirate, too, matey? |
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Mel (USER WAS TOTALLY AWESOME FOR THIS POST) Level: 47 Posts: 117/991 EXP: 762490 For next: 3713 Since: 03-15-04 From: secure tripcodes are for jerks Since last post: 17 min. Last activity: 16 min. |
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Seconds later... The ISM Zantetsuken came ashore, plowing right through Kirbynite's crops. Melvin poked his head out of a window on the bridge, and snapped his fingers. Melvin: Damn it! Only minutes too late! |
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