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| Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - General Chat - Zombies couldn't survive |
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Shiryu Gungun                   Since: 02-24-06 Last post: 6294 days Last view: 6292 days |
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| If zombies have appeared by some sort of magic, then just undo it or make another or whatever. If not, then capture them and put them in quarantine until a way to return them back to their dead people status is found. It shouldn't be too hard becouse they will only go to eat random brains, they don't have inteligence, reason or feelings... | |||
Clockworkz Birdon   Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6292 days Last view: 6292 days |
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| There's only one solution for the zombie problem:
A Chainsaw. Perferrably one that won't run out of gas for about 20 hours until you get to New Jersey, where even the zombies don't wanna go. |
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asdf Link's Awakening ಠ_ಠ  Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6294 days Last view: 6292 days |
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Originally posted by Clockworkz NO. Not only does such a thing not exist, but it's also big and heavy. The survival guide puts it best, so here's the section on chainsaws and the sort.  |
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Shiryu Gungun Since: 02-24-06 Last post: 6294 days Last view: 6292 days |
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| yeah, a chainsaw wouln't be very useful... and cutting their hands or their head or their bodyn is useless since they still still moving... You would have to use either something that allows you to inmovilize them... destroying all their joints would be a good idea so they wouldn't have any way to move. Other way would be to frezze them with something, and then you can get the chainsaw to make sure they don't move anymore.
Note that electricity, fire and stuff is useless becouse they don't feel. You can take their head away so they can't see/are confused about their own position, but that won't kill them. Also taking their whole arm away or something is a bad idea becouse the arm would attack you. Shooting them... can stun them for a while, maybe even stop them. But the best thing would be of course some sort of acid or something, that would actually destroy them. |
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asdf Link's Awakening ಠ_ಠ Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6294 days Last view: 6292 days |
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Originally posted by Shiryu Fire would burn their bodies, reducing them to ash. It's very unsafe, though, but if the situation permits (escaping a horde, destroying a flammable structure with trapped zombies, clearing a fireproof structure), then by all means chuck some motolov cocktails in there until nothing remains. Electricity can stun them for some time, but it takes nearly twice the voltage as it does to stun a human - so a taser wouldn't work. And cutting their head off would kill them. Originally posted by Shiryu You can fill a zombie with bullets, but the only way you'll stop them is with a headshot, taking out the brain. Originally posted by Shiryu Not really - the problem is getting it and implementing it. Furthermore, not only does it take some time to dissolve zombie flesh and bone, but it is as much as a threat to you as it is to your undead pursuers. It's best you use acid as a way of cleaning up after a battle with zombies. |
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Skreename Giant Red Paratroopa Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6299 days Last view: 6292 days |
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Originally posted by asdfHow does that work, praytell? The fact that the brain is the critical part of the zombie implies that there is still activity in their nervous system. Activity in their nervous system implies that electricity would work just as well as on humans. It's not a matter of "pain", it's a matter of ruining what carries the impulses and preventing them from functioning. |
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asdf Link's Awakening ಠ_ಠ Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6294 days Last view: 6292 days |
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Originally posted by Skreename 
What the survival guide says explains it. You really need to read the entire survival guide to understand it all, though. |
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SantaMushroom Bit  Since: 11-19-05 Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6292 days |
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| Fill it with gasoline. Light a match. Yay exploding zombies. I h- raarrahhgggggg. | |||
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Cruel Justice I have better things to do. Since: 11-18-05 From: At my house! Last post: 6293 days Last view: 6293 days |
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| Some ways you can get something close to a zombie...
1.) Premature Alzheimer's with a heavy dose of non-histamine painkillers 2.) A corpse stuffed with lizard's tails, worms, maggots and cockroaches 3.) Someone who's eaten at Arby's; we all get queezy for a few weeks from eating that poison 4.) Some poor bastard super-glued to a zombie costume with his tongue cut off 5.) Deformation from radioactivity; clefting, ichthyosis, harlequinnism, crouzon... 6.) Any significant alteration of the chromosomes. That's all I can come up with... |
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Disruptive Idiot Red Paragoomba Since: 11-17-05 From: Syosset Last post: 6420 days Last view: 6292 days |
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| 7.) A politician
8.) Hippies |
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Tarale    2710 Affected by 'Princess Bitch-Face Syndrome' ++++!! Persona non grata Since: 11-17-05 From: Adelaide, Australia Last post: 6292 days Last view: 6292 days |
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| 9) Me before coffee in the morning, except that I don't hunger for flesh so much as I do for... well.. coffee.
But the lack of mental and motor functions as well as the inability to verbalise well are all definitely present. |
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Koitenshin +∞ Moblin Since: 12-24-05 From: Misery Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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10) Start singing and doing the Zombie dance to Michael Jackson's "Thriller". What? Someone had to say it.   |
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NSNick Gohma IF ALL ELSE FAILS USE BOOZE  Since: 11-17-05 From: Last post: 6294 days Last view: 6294 days |
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| 11) Get shitfaced drunk. | |||
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Tarale 2710 Affected by 'Princess Bitch-Face Syndrome' ++++!! Persona non grata Since: 11-17-05 From: Adelaide, Australia Last post: 6292 days Last view: 6292 days |
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Originally posted by NSNick See, now I'm apparently not zombie-like when I'm extremely drunk, I'm too noisy, stupid and random. Some of my recent hangovers however.... * staring out at the world through bloodshot, unfocused eyes, usually with one eyelid inexplicably more closed than the other and big, black rings around them * skin pale, slightly greenish and clammy * breath that smells of death.... (hangover Jack Daniels smells of death, trust me) * body that smells pretty funky too due to sleeping in clothes * clothes that are torn or stained (last time with blood, dirt and more Jack Daniels -- I fell over and skinned my knees and stuff) * shuffling, because normal walking moves brain around too much in head causing vertigo, dizziness, headache * pretty much zero mental function. * only able to communicate in "ughhhhhhhh" noises And yeah, hunger for flesh.... although by "flesh" I mean "crispy bacon" and it should be accompanied with eggs and toast, and a strong espresso. (edited by Tarale on 10-03-06 12:49 AM) |
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emcee Red Super Koopa Since: 11-20-05 Last post: 6293 days Last view: 6292 days |
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| I don't know, it still seems like most Hollywood monsters have some sort of superhuman abilities that makes them dangerous, but not only do zombies not have any special powers, they actually seem less capable then normal humans.
If I was being attacked by zombies, I would walk briskly away from them. |
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Metal Knuckles Tendoru  Since: 12-21-05 From: New Hampshire Last post: 6292 days Last view: 6292 days |
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| According to this thread and what I've learned, if I saw a zombie, I'd pee on it.
Also, what does the zombie survival guide say in reference to motar vehicles? Those of the large and slamtacular brand in particular? |
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Tarale 2710 Affected by 'Princess Bitch-Face Syndrome' ++++!! Persona non grata Since: 11-17-05 From: Adelaide, Australia Last post: 6292 days Last view: 6292 days |
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Originally posted by Metal Knuckles I dunno, but considering the guide seems centered around destroying the brain and I can't imagine that a car will do this very effectively.... I'd say cars are good for moving quickly through zombies and away from them? Although they have the noise issue so you'd have to go a long way away from them..... (edited by Tarale on 10-03-06 11:42 PM) |
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rubixcuber Mole  Since: 09-08-06 From: St. Louis, MO Last post: 6402 days Last view: 6402 days |
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| There's an essay somewhere called "The Best Way to Kill a Zombie is with a Rocket Launcher." I wouldn't have thought that necessarily the best way but how can you argue with the internet? | |||
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asdf Link's Awakening ಠ_ಠ Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6294 days Last view: 6292 days |
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Originally posted by TaraleOriginally posted by Metal Knuckles Yeah. The dreaded noise issue. And the issue of gas, breakdowns, terrain, safety, even traffic jams during higher-level invasions. Thusforth, vehicles aren't necessarily the best way to flee an invasion. Sedans usually get obstructed by bad terrain, and not all SUVs are equipped to travel over bad terrain - then there's the gas issue. Motorcycles are ideal if you don't need anything else, but a bicycle would give the best of both worlds - little noise and speed. Just wear safety gear, don't crash, and choose caution over speed... Armored cars are a good defensive vehicle. Here's what the ZSG says on vehicles in general. 
That doesn't necessarily mean they are useless, however. A certain zombie hunting technique incorporates vehicles into the strategy for a very effective way of killing the undead.  (edited by asdf on 10-04-06 12:06 AM) |
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Cruel Justice I have better things to do. Since: 11-18-05 From: At my house! Last post: 6293 days Last view: 6293 days |
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| Unless you're really stupid or there are too many zombies, you're more likely to get killed by a homeless man in a wheelchair. I'd just take a few more steps back everytime they lurch towards me, check the time and get back home to eat some cheerios, then walk back outside to see how far my smelly dead friends walked down the sidewalk. If I get bored, I'll just sever it's head with a machete; nothing special.
An average moron would run around within reaching distance of the zombie shouting, "How do I kill this thing!? This isn't a human omgwtf!? Oh I know! Cut it's head o..." and get themselves killed. (edited by [GGS] Cruel Justice on 10-04-06 09:52 AM) |
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