 |
| Register | Login | |||||
 |
Main
| Memberlist
| Active users
| ACS
| Commons
| Calendar
| Online users Ranks | FAQ | Color Chart | Photo album | IRC Chat |
|
| | ||
|
| Register | Login | |||||
|
Main
| Memberlist
| Active users
| ACS
| Commons
| Calendar
| Online users Ranks | FAQ | Color Chart | Photo album | IRC Chat |
|
| | ||
| Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - - Posts by Karadur |
| Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 |
| User | Post | ||
Karadur Fire Snake  Level: 48  Posts: 41/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Good God he did it. I just had a short chat with him, and here's what got said: Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: Well..its over...I am leaving all irc's...all dragon sites...everything...I dont belong and never did nor never will... Karadur says: That's sort of what I felt you were getting at all along. I didn't want to bring it up though Karadur says: If it's any condolence, I'm sorry to hear that Kari Si Sharikan Reskel sighs Karadur says: But please don't tell me by 'everything' you want to 'leave this world' again Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: This chapter in the story is now done...it is time to leave it behind and either move on or end the book. Karadur says: I understand that completely Karadur says: You're doing what you want to do, and that makes me happy Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: at least you can be..For I never will be again... Karadur says: Why. You think you won't have any friends? Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: Be free from me and be happy again..B.Y.E...... Karadur says: What??? I... guess, if that's what you want, but... well, I don't mean to force anything on you, but if you ever want to talk to me again, I'll be glad to I seriously don't know what to say. I'm glad to hear he's getting on with life, but what he said... it almost makes me think he hated me  He just went offline, and I guess I'll never see him again. I can't believe this... I may as well post the site I talked about in my last post here right now: dragon-realms.com Go to 'Forums', 'Support and Advice' and find the thread 'The Hopeless Dragon'. The site ruined his life. What the fsck. It's a dragon site, obviously, but they've taken it way too far. Everyone there's saying they're Otherkin and stuff, and the overall 'caring level' of the site is completely gone. I was once a member there, and I still have my profile, but I'll be damned if I ever log in again. (edited by Karadur on 11-13-04 06:16 PM) (edited by Karadur on 11-13-04 06:20 PM) (edited by Karadur on 11-13-04 06:22 PM) (edited by Karadur on 11-13-04 06:23 PM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 42/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| I'm truly hoping he doesn't want to die again. That's pretty much what I was asking when I said "But please don't tell me by 'everything' you want to 'leave this world' again". The worse thing about it is that if he wants to, I've figuratively not able to do anything but stand back and watch. I've still got his email, but I don't think I'm going to send him something anytime soon. I reread what he said quite a few times over (not only what I posted here) and it almost seems like he got mad at whoever tried to help him. As far as others caring about him on the site, yes, everyone did the first few posts he made, but you'll notice in the second or third page how people (such as Vellos and Sedyana) say they're getting tired of it basically. I know I put something in there as well, and it won't make any difference to say it now, but the only reason I agreed with them was because I wanted to fit in. What a stupid mistake to make. When the site started out (back in January of this year), it seemed like a nice place. For what it's worth, I registered there sometime during the first week of January. Since then it's seemed to slide into some sort of elitist "Otherkin only" thing. I know there've been good defenses to that, and maybe I'm jumping to a conclusion way too early. It's just that when it started, it seemed like a nice, friendly place to be. Much like SDD was when it still existed. You might also want to take a look at the thread in the same section called "Enough is Enough" or something like that. If it makes it easier, the thread poster is Shanrrosh. Someone finally said something about what's happening to the site. I feel sorry for the admins (Forfaox, Stik, and maybe Etath). They tried to do something good with the site, then this sort of thing happens. I do respect Kari for what he did though. I can't even begin to describe how hard it must've been to just say 'bye" like that. When it comes to talking to him, I think if what got done in the past month (talking to him on MSN and such) got done after his first post in that thread. I'd be talking to him still right now if he hadn't gone offline, and I'd have liked for you to try to talk to him as well, Vampriel. It would've showed him that someone that hardly knows anything about him cares enough to try to help. I shouldn't dwell on this too long, or I'm just going to get myself depressed. What's happened has unfortunately happened, and I did as much as I could to help. I'll never know if it was enough though. (edited by Karadur on 11-13-04 07:47 PM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 43/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| You've taken a good first step. Telling us instead of holding it all up inside. Like Dark Vampriel said, funerals are always sad. Even if it's someone that you hated with the whole of yourself. I've been to two so far. One for my Grandma, and one for my friend's Grandma. The first one wasn't nearly as sad as the second, mainly 'cause I was still trying to come to grips with what exactly happened. The second one was more sad though. It's the first time in my life I've actually seen my friend openly cry about something. This might sound cold, so I'm sorry if it does. You should think about how things went. They probably could've been much worse, like your Nan being in some hospital really far away, or not even being in the hospital when she died. What would've been worse. To be there when she finally passed away, or like what happened to you, to be out doing something else? Even in death, there's things to be glad for, like your Nan not suffering anymore. As far as your girlfriend and best friend, there's always going to be people you meet that eventually turn out to be asses, and you've unfortunately run into that at a particularly bad time. It's best to just not think about what happened right now. When it comes to Michelle, if you're able to, explain to her exactly what happened. The worst that can happen is that she'll still be mad at you, but at least you'd have told her the truth. Finally, about being on the peak of suicide. You may not realize it, but how many people do you think would be hurt if you were to kill yourself? I've just had a bad final experience with someone I cared about and considered a friend today, and as much as he may think he won't hurt me by what he's done, it does, but I'm doing my best to get through it, and I think you should too. If you're looking for something to do, talk with a family member or a friend about the fun you had with your Nan. It may hurt at first, but once you realize that she's not completely gone from you, it'll make you feel better. It's like at the beginning of Tales of Symphonia, where Genis ends up having a hand in killing Marble. He can't believe what's happened at first, but then he realizes he has a keepsake of hers (in this case, her Exsphere). Find something of your Nan's that you can always hang on to. It may just help when you aren't expecting it. |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 44/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| If you're using a different skin than the default one, try switching. I downloaded one skin on my computer that slows Winamp horribly. If that doesn't work, you could try changing the "Priority Class" setting. Go to preferences -> General Preferences, and see what it's at. I've got it set to Normal right now, and I'm using the KMS V.1 skin and everything's running smoothly. I might as well add that if you haven't recently, to run a Spyware scan on your computer. There's a freebie one you can use here. |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 45/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
Either put the file in the folder of the program that needs it, or put it in the Windows/System (or System32 if you're on XP. Maybe for 2000, but I'm not sure) directory. Hopefully one of those works  (edited by Karadur on 11-13-04 09:08 PM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 46/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Ok then. I just did a search in google, and I found this. I wouldn't know if the software from the link they give will do anything though, so it's up to you if you want to use it or not. (edited by Karadur on 11-13-04 09:21 PM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 47/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Are those ship GFX from Mc. Kids? Except for the Bowser on the sail, it looks almost exactly like it Edit: I read the comment below the first picture finally  I like the game as well (although good luck getting it to work in the Nintendo), so it's cool to see someone using the GFX from it There's no complaints I can make right now. These screenshots look good  (edited by Karadur on 11-14-04 11:42 AM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 48/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Well, now that I can finally get to these boards again, I can say more on this. This afternoon, I just got a "hi Karadur" from him. Didn't say much, but we didn't talk at all about what happened before, so I can tell he is really putting it behind him. That's good to know, and I also now know I helped him in some way I still don't know what's going to happen with his LJ. He made it quite clear that he'd be writing a big thing in it, then a week or so later deleting the thing. So far I don't see any sign of this big thing, so I have to guess he's not going to write it with his whole decision to put what happened behind him, or else he's still in the process of writing it. Whatever he does though, I hope it doesn't put him back into what sort of mood he was in before  (edited by Karadur on 11-16-04 08:13 PM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 49/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Hmm. I can think up one thing that may work off the top of my head. It didn't really have to do with insomnia, but still about sleep: stay up for as long as you're able to, but make sure you go to bed when you usually would the next day or whenever you finally start getting tired. Otherwise, try reading or doing something similar that calms you down before you go to bed. If you still can't get to sleep, don't force yourself. Just find something to keep you busy until you do get tired |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 50/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Definitely the Admin account. I usually download at least one thing that requires installing in a week, and I'd find it awkward to have to switch to an Admin-type account each time I wanted to use what I'd gotten or install. Also, Limited users are subject to quotas if you've got them set up (I'm talking about XP here). I'd hate to have a limited amount of storage space to work with (not that you don't even as an Admin, but there it's the whole hard drive space) Another thing is sometimes you get things popping up about upgrading software such as a virus scanner or something. I'd guess most programs would require you to be logged on as an Admin to be able to upgrade. I have everyone using Firefox on this computer, but I still sometimes load up IE if I need it for a certain page. To answer the thread title question, I use an Admin account for surfing, everyone else uses their own Limited accounts |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 51/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| This site has quite a few clients for different OS'es, but it doesn't have any sort of rating for 'em, so you'll just have to look through and choose with one you like best |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 52/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
I guess I spoke too soon  More about that after we finish our MSN conversation. |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 53/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| So far not really. It's stopped, or at least it seems like it right now, so I'll put what's been said in here: ------- Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: Well, I guess its time I face facts and just give up trying. This life, this world, this time, all of it was not meant for me. Karadur says: No. Don't tell me you want to die again Karadur says: And besides. I thought you were putting what happened behind you Karadur says: You were in a good mood from what I saw yesterday. What's happened that put you back in this mood Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: I just dont care anymore. Karadur says: Well, it's getting harder for me to say this now, but I still do. I was glad to see that you were going through with putting things behind you a week or so ago, but it's come to the point where I really don't know what to do anymore. i don't want to see you just throw your life away, yet I don't know what to tell you besides what I've already said before Kari Si Sharikan Reskel sighs Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: Be free and be happy Karadur and worry about me no more. Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: I am not worth the time or the effort and I never was. Karadur says: You know what I said when you did this last time. I really hope you don't take it to an extreme where you do kill yourself or die somehow. Always have something to take your mind off these sorts of things Karadur says: If you're willing to answer it, why aren't you worth the time or effort? Because you hurt the people that try to help? That's true, but if the people that are trying to help you care enough to keep at it, I don't think you should keep saying you aren't worth it. Nobody deserves to die, whether by their hands or some other way Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: my life has no meaing to me anymore, no reason, no hopes.... Karadur says: Also with worrying about you no more. I may be able to do that if I don't think about you for a while, but there'll always be the nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I couldn't help as much as I wanted to Karadur says: Then find someone, something, anything that gives it meaning. Something you're proud of maybe, or good memories that you have. Keep those in mind always. Who knows what'll happen Karadur says: This is probably going to sound quite mean, but don't take it that way. Almost every part of me right now is saying "Stop worrying about this guy. You'll be alot happier, and things'll be good." It hurts to see you feeling this way though, and that's the only thing keeping me caring about you right now Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: Then give up..I am not worth it. Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: I never was. Karadur says: No. Simply no. I'm the only one that has the right to make that choice. Not you, not my parents or whoever else. Only me Karadur says: Do you want people to stop worrying about you because you want them to feel good or something? Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: so they can be happy again with out me in their lives. Karadur says: Will that really happen though? If they were to just stop worrying about you when you told them to, it would only solve their problems. Not yours Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: my life means nothing to me now, none of it. Karadur says: Why not Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: I dont care anymore. Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: I give up Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: why try Karadur says: That's quite broad. I'm looking for specific reasons as to why Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: there is no specifc reason, just that I dont care about me or this place, this world, this time, my life, none of it, anymore... Karadur says: Then let me take another broad guess: because things aren't going the way you'd like them to. Might that be a part of it? Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: no, I just dont care anymore, its not worth the effort too anymore. Karadur says: Well, if that's truly what you think, then I don't know what to say about it. I want to tell you over and over you are worth the effort, but if you don't care and there's no specific reason why. I can't think of anything to say. I don't want that to sound like I don't care anymore, because I do Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: just give up, im not worth it. Be free and be happy again. Karadur says: Did you forget already what I said? I'm the only one that can make the choice to give up on you. I'd like to be happy again, but I know I won't be able to unless I know you're feeling better, and before you even say it, killing yourself won't make you feel better the way you're probably hoping it will Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: it will for I will be free and off this world. Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: free from the pains here. Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: free from having to feel pain or care anymore. Karadur says: Yes, but you'll most likely remember the people that tried to help you Karadur says: I wouldn't be surprised if it puts you back in another foul mood Kari Si Sharikan Reskel sighs Karadur says: As far as your life not having meaning, it's up to you to find something that gives it meaning. It could be anything from helping someone to the games you like to play Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: those games mean nothing to me. Karadur says: It doesn't have to be games Karadur says: I guess the reason I said that one is 'cause I like playing games, making hacks or romhacking in general, and helping people with games. They're a big part of my life, but that doesn't mean they have to be for you Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: there is nothing that means anything to me anymore. Karadur says: There has to be something, or you'd be dead already Kari Si Sharikan Reskel says: All will be happier with out me in thier life to cause worries and pains. ---- How I feel about this is pretty much summed up in the above conversation. (edited by Karadur on 11-17-04 10:29 PM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 54/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| I'd like for you to do that, so I've just asked if it's alright with him. Just waiting for a reply... | |||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 55/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| He's already said it's up to me. Just when I try to invite you, I get something about the invite not getting sent to you. What timing. I just tried inviting you again, but it told me you were already part of the conversation (but not up in the 'To:' field), then a couple seconds later said the invite couldn't be sent again (edited by Karadur on 11-17-04 11:01 PM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 56/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Stuff above the line is irrelevant now Darn. The only thing I could think of is that we're using Messenger Plus, and you're probably using normal messenger. You might try inviting us, and if that doesn't work, I can send you the Messenger Plus installer. If you want to try inviting us: Me: karadur_77@hotmail.com Him: morkeleb2005@insightbb.com Well that went well. </sarcasm> For those that are interested or concerned, he did his "B.Y.E" thing again right after Vampriel asked him to explain why a total stranger would care about him I said I didn't think he'd kill himself, since if he really did try to before, what happened then would happen again. That could very well be wishful thinking though. Now that he knows the address to this site, if by any chance he's reading this, you may very well get angry at me for saying what I did, but everyone's entitled to their own opinion. I did what I thought was best; telling others about the problem I was having, and getting their opinions and possibly advice on the situation. I still think I did the right thing making this thread. It's going to hurt me quite a bit eventually if I keep everything that's happening in regards to this matter all bottled up inside. So I'm going to wait it out right now. Hopefully nothing related to death happens. (edited by Karadur on 11-17-04 11:09 PM) (edited by Karadur on 11-18-04 12:33 AM) (edited by Karadur on 11-18-04 12:35 AM) |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 57/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
Originally posted by Trapster |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 58/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Wha...? You get to use an energy sword as Master Chief sometime? I was down to my friend's house in London last weekend, and he bought the game the day or night that it came out or something. Besides the addition of the new Covenant weapons, I'd rather have the guns from the old game. I didn't see a whole lot of the game when I was there. We did some multi, then a couple random coop campaign levels. The big part of one was you were playing as Covenant, going down on some elevator, and flood kept appearing and you had to kill them. Then there was a city-like level, where there's a big walker thing going around and blasting the heck out of buildings with some beam coming from it's 'eye'. We did the final level last, but I missed most of the speech in the end movie. They probably explain what you see on the projector thing (I won't say what for those people that haven't beaten it yet), but I still wonder what the point of the whole game was. Like I told my friend over MSN, it's probably gonna be like Final Fantasy all over again. It never ends All the time building up to the release of the game, there's all this hype about how good it'll be and such, and I guess the game's good. The levels and stuff are new, and they're fun to play, but it leaves me wanting more. |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 59/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| Tying kids to trees and letting birds poop on him? For shame! It's good to hear that things are going better for you now though |
|||
|
Karadur Fire Snake Level: 48 Posts: 60/1192 EXP: 786444 For next: 37099 Since: 11-02-04 From: Chatham, Ontario, Canada Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 15 hours |
| ||
| I take it this thread is to find out where everyone lives, and see if anyone else here lives close to you, right? If that's the case, as my location says, I live in Chatham, Ontario, Canada. I'm sure there are other people here that live in Canada, but what about closer than that? |
| Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 |
| Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - - Posts by Karadur |
