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11-02-05 12:59 PM
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Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - Lost Section - Age difference | | Thread closed
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spncram

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Posted on 04-18-04 04:13 PM Link
Well, for the last couple weeks I have been hanging around a lot of new people. One of them (a girl named Karyn) I have been talking to frequently and visiting her house almost every day. I think it would be wonderful if we were to date; she is such an awesome person! I can tell her anything and trust that it is kept secret and know that she actually cares about what is going on in my life! I really would enjoy being closer to her.

The problem? I


(edited by spncram on 04-18-04 07:14 AM)
WhiteWitch

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Posted on 04-18-04 04:22 PM Link
Your 18, 18 year olds take on alot of responsability. If you truly love her, and think you both can work out, then i would go for it. To me 3 years age difference is nothing and should not matter. Maybe tell her you love her and that, maybe then suggest if you wait till she is 16 for your relation to grow. But like i said 3 years difference is nothing and should not matter, i don't see a problem with it
Apophis

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Posted on 04-18-04 04:25 PM Link
I agree with most of that, but for one thing. Don't tell her you love her. I mean, if you haven't even started dating yet, that would be coming on far too strong.

Also, I admire your ability to take a step back and look at the situation from another person's perspective. That takes maturity.
blackfire

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Posted on 04-18-04 04:56 PM Link

In thinking about it 3 years age difference isn't that much. In todays society age differnce dosn't matter that much from what i have seen. Some people like people older than them and others like them younger. It would only seem wrong to me if you were more than 6 years apart in age difference.

If you really like her then it shouldn't matter to much because it dosn't seem like your looking for that one thing most teenage males have on there mind. Just don't come on to strong and see how it goes.
Apocalypse

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Posted on 04-18-04 05:08 PM Link
Age doesn't matter,
If you both like each other you should go for it, I haven't been in this situation but I still believe there isn't a problem with it.
It is good that you are thinking about it seriously which shows you arent like 18 year olds dating 15 year olds are stereotyped to be. Shows you are more mature than most
Don't listen to waht others think or say as it is up to you and you know whats best for you, do what you think is right not what others do.
Good Luck
kiwibonga

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Posted on 04-18-04 06:22 PM Link
For the legal part, as long as there's parental consent there should be no problem. If the parents really don't like you though they can easily put a restraining order into effect

As for the moral part... As long as you don't look 10 years older it should be fine My first girlfriend was almost 3 years older (I was 16, she was almost 19), yet we looked the same age..

Oh yeah and to score points with her parents: You're getting A's in every subject in college and you want to be a doctor or a lawyer
snipy_chipy

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Posted on 04-18-04 06:44 PM Link
Well, you said you visite her at home almost every day, so I dont think the parents are much of a problem. My advice is to keep being good friends with her. She just got in high school, there is alot of new things she will experience. Im just saying, when you enter high school there are plenty new people of the opposite sex you usually lust after. Since she will have a boyfriend, she wont be able to do that. But since its nearly the end of the year, maybe. My advice is to play it thruw the summer.

WhiteWitch & Anophis, he didnt say anything about love.
CESum

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Posted on 04-18-04 09:44 PM Link
I say just watch youself, respect her limits, and have fun.

Of course, for the next 4 months, I'm the young'un in my relationship (my g/f is 18, I'm 17. Not as big of a difference.)
Uncle Elmo

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Posted on 04-18-04 09:48 PM Link
My ex fiancee was 15 and I was 19 when we started dating. The only warning I'd have for you is that although she may SEEM more mature, she may not be. I found this to my cost, as, at 24 I was ready to settle down and get married, while she was 19, going on 20 and felt that her life had a long way to go yet. She ripped my heart to pieces, She's now dating an old highschool friend. Someone she'd overlooked as she was dating me. They're now living together I hear.


So, in a nut shell, relationships like that CAN survive, and the elder you get, the less the age difference matters.
tinzeee
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Posted on 04-19-04 08:20 AM Link
The age shouldn't really matter, 3 years difference is not that big a deal, but when you see the ages of these people them yeah. 15 years is ok, she is old enough to make her own decisions.
I have a friend who is in the same situation, but he is 17 and she is 14. You would really have to see what happens.
Goodluck
HighSorceressDelial

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Posted on 04-19-04 09:57 AM Link
It's really great that you're thinking about this, and I do think you should go out with her. People in their 40's can date 30-50 year olds and it won't really seem like a huge difference.

But, keep in mind you are 18, and if you do anything sexual with her you could go to jail. I know it may seem ok at the time, but parents/relatives/she could turn you in if the relationship goes bad or something happens. So you have to keep up being responsible and keep things to a minimum, at least until she's a bit older.

~Delial
Kario

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Posted on 04-19-04 10:02 AM Link
Well, here in Texas it is illegal. They do have the sweetheart act in effect. If you are 18 or older, you can date younger people as long as they are within 2 years of your age.
Kefka
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Posted on 04-19-04 11:38 AM Link
Well, I know an 18 year old here who got a 14 year old pregnant, so...

Just don't have sex with her while she's not an adult, and you should be fine
Ambigore

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Posted on 04-19-04 06:23 PM Link
I agree with most of that, but for one thing. Don't tell her you love her. I mean, if you haven't even started dating yet, that would be coming on far too strong.

I agree. 90% of womyn are parasitic, life-sucking demons. Do not exhibit emotions. In fact, do not exhibit anything human except your wallet, your bank account and your car.

But seriously, there shouldn't be too much of a problem with you dating a 15 year-old. Just make sure she's not emotionally-using you. Women look to mature guys for that kind of thing.
paradox

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Posted on 04-20-04 03:44 AM Link
Originally posted by Ambigore
I agree with most of that, but for one thing. Don't tell her you love her. I mean, if you haven't even started dating yet, that would be coming on far too strong.

I agree. 90% of womyn are parasitic, life-sucking demons. Do not exhibit emotions. In fact, do not exhibit anything human except your wallet, your bank account and your car.

But seriously, there shouldn't be too much of a problem with you dating a 15 year-old. Just make sure she's not emotionally-using you. Women look to mature guys for that kind of thing.
uhh, 90% yea right, probably 90% of the attractive ones for you shallow people...im not shallow i have dated many girls that many people think arnt that attractive but i thought each and every one of them were beautiful...i say if you like a girl go for it, even if there is an age difference
RoboticParanoia

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Posted on 04-20-04 07:01 AM Link
Originally posted by Ambigore
I agree with most of that, but for one thing. Don't tell her you love her. I mean, if you haven't even started dating yet, that would be coming on far too strong.

I agree. 90% of womyn are parasitic, life-sucking demons. Do not exhibit emotions. In fact, do not exhibit anything human except your wallet, your bank account and your car.

But seriously, there shouldn't be too much of a problem with you dating a 15 year-old. Just make sure she's not emotionally-using you. Women look to mature guys for that kind of thing.


Sounds like someone stomped on your heart a bunch of times.

Good luck with you in your love life's future!
kinhad

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Posted on 04-20-04 08:15 AM Link
yes, age difference should average about 3 years. it doesn't matter really though, as long as you find somebody that makes you happy. it's very difficult to find the right one, but it'll happen someday.
Lord Rahl

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Posted on 04-20-04 09:50 AM Link
Originally posted by HighSorceressDelial
[...]But, keep in mind you are 18, and if you do anything sexual with her you could go to jail.[...]


Actually, that depends on the country you live in. Different countries have different laws. Canada, for example, says that once you're 14, you can consent to sex.

Anyway, back on topic. I'd say go for it. If you both act mature then, in my mind at least, it's fine. I know of a relationship in my school between a guy in grade 12, aged 18, and a girl in grade 8, aged 14.
Ambigore

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Posted on 04-20-04 09:42 PM Link
Originally posted by RoboticParanoia


Sounds like someone stomped on your heart a bunch of times.

Good luck with you in your love life's future!


Nah, I'm cool, but I'm quite serious about womyn emotionally-using mature guys. Beware you do not become the "therapist" or "intellectual partner" in a womyn's life. This is especially the case if you're relatively older than her (or behave in such a mature way).
hhallahh

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Posted on 04-21-04 10:56 AM Link
Age of consent laws vary with state as well as country.

This is the resource
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