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| Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - Lost Section - In a quandry; a love-related quandry |
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Seph2k4 Bob-Omb Level: 39 Posts: 608/619 EXP: 376086 For next: 28685 Since: 03-16-04 Since last post: 6 days Last activity: 6 days |
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| Sounds good. Also... Is it a good idea to complement them in any way, like by saying "you look good today" or "your shirt/sweatshirt/whatever looks good on you, I like it" or anything along the lines of that? Because I was considering taking that same approach today in school, but I didn't know if it was such a good idea or not, and I don't mean like taking it too seriously or anything by saying that they're "hot" or "sexy" or whatever. She probably wouldn't like that too much. And for the record, I DID try to "go for it all" right away by immediately giving my last love interest a nice letter, actually make that two, and it seemed to have been doing it's magic... but then again, that was advice coming from someone who's dated her. He would know if it would work or not. I wish I could say I've met someone who's dated this new girl in the past, but I don't know anyone who has done so as of yet. (edited by Seph2k4 on 09-07-05 07:08 PM) (edited by Seph2k4 on 09-07-05 07:09 PM) (edited by Seph2k4 on 09-07-05 07:31 PM) (edited by Seph2k4 on 09-07-05 07:31 PM) |
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Thayer Fuzz Ball Level: 38  Posts: 402/988 EXP: 349428 For next: 21019 Since: 06-28-05 Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 1 day |
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| Complimenting is fine as long as it seems natural, I think. | |||
Danielle Local Moderator  Level: 76  Posts: 2274/3359 EXP: 3958078 For next: 47982 Since: 09-15-04 From: RATE Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 3 hours |
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Originally posted by Thayer Agreed. Most girls love a nice compliment, but don't force it or anything.  |
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Thayer Fuzz Ball Level: 38 Posts: 420/988 EXP: 349428 For next: 21019 Since: 06-28-05 Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 1 day |
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Personal experience says that too many compliments will not aid you.  |
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Bella Ludwig Von Koopa You're Gonna Love Me Level: 76  Posts: 2205/2962 EXP: 3891483 For next: 114577 Since: 03-29-04 From: Groovy Way Since last post: 8 min. Last activity: 6 min. |
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Yeah, I'd love a few compliments a day  . Anyone would and if you do then she'll remember it all day most likely  so that you'll be on her mind. |
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Danielle Local Moderator Level: 76 Posts: 2309/3359 EXP: 3958078 For next: 47982 Since: 09-15-04 From: RATE Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 3 hours |
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Too many compliments.. I don't see how you could do that unless you became freakish about it. Complimenting every little thing until it's obvious you're up to something.  But I'm sure you're smarter than that. Be cool~ |
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Arwon Zora Level: 35  Posts: 459/506 EXP: 278115 For next: 1821 Since: 03-15-04 From: Terra Australis Incognita Since last post: 5 hours Last activity: 10 min. |
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Originally posted by Thayer That probably means compliments weren't the issue. They can't make someone who doesn't like you want you, but they can help with an attraction that *is* there. Or something. |
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Seph2k4 Bob-Omb Level: 39 Posts: 609/619 EXP: 376086 For next: 28685 Since: 03-16-04 Since last post: 6 days Last activity: 6 days |
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| Slight update on the situation... I just talked to one of her good friends today after dismissal, and from what I've learned, she isn't currently seeing anybody at the moment, meaning that she isn't currently in a relationship and isn't in the midst of one, either (at least it's *fairly* safe to say that she isn't). She also said I would, or at least might, actually be better off expressing my true feelings for her OVER to her in public (I was actually thinking about doing that, but that would be a big risk factor; in other words, scaring her off, and that would be the end of that). Apparently, she *has* received a note or two from somebody else, and I remember her saying that she *almost* responded to it. I did the same, only I held on to it for several days until finally deciding to pass it as I was waiting for the right moment to send it off to her (I gave it to her friend). In short, I've heard good things from her and in the end, it could all work out. If she's the one to contact me about it tomorrow, I'm probably in good hands. |
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Bella Ludwig Von Koopa You're Gonna Love Me Level: 76 Posts: 2343/2962 EXP: 3891483 For next: 114577 Since: 03-29-04 From: Groovy Way Since last post: 8 min. Last activity: 6 min. |
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Yay! You finally did at least something to express how you feel about her..but..have you talked to her anymore than you last left us off? It'd be good if you did, so she can at least have a good response tomorrow. I'd be like  if a guy I barely talk to likes me, if a guy did give me a letter I barely knew I'd tell him to talk to me more.. |
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Danielle Local Moderator Level: 76 Posts: 2384/3359 EXP: 3958078 For next: 47982 Since: 09-15-04 From: RATE Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 3 hours |
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| You should try talking more with her than her friends.. honestly. I'm sure she'd like to know more than her friends, especially when it concerns her. Talk to her man! |
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Bella Ludwig Von Koopa You're Gonna Love Me Level: 76 Posts: 2346/2962 EXP: 3891483 For next: 114577 Since: 03-29-04 From: Groovy Way Since last post: 8 min. Last activity: 6 min. |
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| Yeah, sometimes friends don't always have the most accurate information either so keep that in mind. Now that you did this letter thing you should talk to her way more than it seems you are now. We've all been telling you this since the beginning . Just do it! You came this far already so start a few convos. |
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Seph2k4 Bob-Omb Level: 39 Posts: 612/619 EXP: 376086 For next: 28685 Since: 03-16-04 Since last post: 6 days Last activity: 6 days |
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| It began a matter of weeks ago. Now it seems like it's over between us two... or is it? I've been starting several conversations with her lately. Every time I did so, I felt like I was becoming closer and closer to her. I felt the momentum swinging in my direction. I would say/do nice things for her whenever the opportunity came, and did the very best I could to try and satisfy her. I may not the most "active" person in the world, but I felt like I did the best I could with the somewhat social impairment that I have from autism (as you may have read, I posted a thread on that in this forum not too long ago). I was planning on doing yet more of it today... but then something rather misfortunate got in the way: when 4th period came around, word came that she's now with someone else over at another school. And apparently, they just started dating, it seems. Still, it's not to say that I didn't at least try to start something with her. I desperately tried... but my fragileness caught up with me in the end. I'm one of the easiest people to hurt the feelings of around, which is why I didn't decide to just "pull the trigger" and straight-up ask her out (I was afraid she'd say "no" ). That's also why I didn't straight-up tell her how I felt about her: because then I would risk her not wanting anything having to do with me, and that would really make me feel bad. And thus, when asking a girl out, it's always over, whether she says yes or not (but it's obviously a whole lot worse if she says no), and after taking a mental-beating like the one I suffered a year back (having my past love neglect me for someone she liked better), I didn't think it would ever come to down to this again... but she proved me wrong. She's everything I look for in a girl. She even made me feel somewhat better about it by hugging me today at the end of class. Very nice girl indeed. So, even in spite of all of this, I think it's safe to say that we are at least friends, and I'll definitely try her again when she rebecomes available, whenever that may be. I even managed to get her contact information (namely her IM handle) incase we don't ever get to see eachother anymore by the end of it. As sad as it makes me, I can't honestly say that any trust or passion for her has been lost. She's the one that convinced me otherwise, after all. Simply not caring for her any longer will only make me feel as though I've betrayed her, and she never really broke my heart, or anything. Choosing one person over the other and rejecting are two different things. So, unless I happen to meet someone else who catches my interest (an "alternative" if you will, and it'll most likely be outside of school, if anywhere), I won't give up on her. Apparently, this new guy has been onto her for several years (ever since she moved here from Colorado, evidently). He's waited his turn. Maybe it's time I waited mine. Part of this "love" game is being patient, after all. Rushing into things usually doesn't work out between opposite sexes. Taking it slowly seems to work best. And if and when it finally does happen, I'll try and cheer her up. One of the things girls really want is for someone to look after them, and that seems to be my greatest strength that can outweigh my greatest weakness when it comes to this.(edited by Seph2k4 on 09-29-05 05:33 PM) (edited by Seph2k4 on 09-29-05 05:43 PM) (edited by Seph2k4 on 09-29-05 05:53 PM) |
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Bella Ludwig Von Koopa You're Gonna Love Me Level: 76 Posts: 2579/2962 EXP: 3891483 For next: 114577 Since: 03-29-04 From: Groovy Way Since last post: 8 min. Last activity: 6 min. |
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Well, I'm very happy for you that you tried . At least you tried to trigger more and mroe conversations with her. It's not the end of the world. Just try not to stay stuck on her because she isnt the only girl in this world. Sometimes you do have to come out and ask the person. If the girl said no, then okay, let that go and move on to someone else. I know it's hard, especially if you find out the person has a boyfriend. I mean if it doesn't work out with her current guy, then by all means really take that but don't wish for her to break up with him or anything  just so you could get at her like that. If she's happy then you be happy for her. Even if she has a boyfriend then you can get to know her more so that you'll be close to her and if this guy does hurt her you'll be there for her. If someone else catches your eye go for that even more because you have experience with this girl trying to work up to asking her out (even though you didn't have a chance to) then you could use what you used with this girl but just make sure you talk directly to the girl for your information needs because you can't always rely on others. |
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SamuraiX Paratroopa Level: 19 Posts: 65/140 EXP: 32602 For next: 3175 Since: 10-11-04 From: ^___^ Since last post: 2 hours Last activity: 2 hours |
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Originally posted by Danielle What she said. |
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Danielle Local Moderator Level: 76 Posts: 2682/3359 EXP: 3958078 For next: 47982 Since: 09-15-04 From: RATE Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 3 hours |
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| It's great that you're not letting it get you down, Seph. There could very possibly be another chance, and having a friendship now is pretty beneficial, in my opinion. Just keep being a nice friendly guy, and she won't forget about you. |
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Seph2k4 Bob-Omb Level: 39 Posts: 613/619 EXP: 376086 For next: 28685 Since: 03-16-04 Since last post: 6 days Last activity: 6 days |
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Originally posted by Bella To be blunt, I never wish that about anyone that I like (or ever have liked for that matter), unless I come to find that the current guy she's dating is some huge prick or whatever, that doesn't truly deserve her, and she doesn't know it yet. I wish (actually, scratch that, I don't wish) that I could say the same for this new guy she's dating... but like I said, I don't even know him for he's over at another school, and he must be a pretty nice guy, having someone like her. And yet we're still close, in some way. Even knowing that she's now dating, I still stay close to her, talking to her, and such. The fact that she's now dating someone hasn't altered that fact at all. Just as long as she's happy, I'm fine. It was fun and worthwhile talking to her and everything, but then again, there really wasn't much I could do since he's been talking to her for quite some time and known her for years now, whereas I've only known her for... what, a year? And have only been talking to her for... a matter of weeks, perhaps? I won't try to get too optomistic, but *MAYBE* I'm next in line. Who knows? (edited by Seph2k4 on 09-30-05 06:32 PM) |
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Bella Ludwig Von Koopa You're Gonna Love Me Level: 76 Posts: 2613/2962 EXP: 3891483 For next: 114577 Since: 03-29-04 From: Groovy Way Since last post: 8 min. Last activity: 6 min. |
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Yeah, I was just saying because some people do that and it's like  as long as the person is happy. Just stay hopeful and things will work out just right for you . It's better for those that wait! |
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Wurl 4.0 Level: 18  Posts: 117/244 EXP: 27558 For next: 2339 Since: 09-11-05 From: Illinois: Land of Eternal Desert Since last post: 11 hours Last activity: 10 hours |
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| If you wait, you might realize she's a skank. Happened to me before, but she will be hitting on you by then. | |||
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Seph2k4 Bob-Omb Level: 39 Posts: 614/619 EXP: 376086 For next: 28685 Since: 03-16-04 Since last post: 6 days Last activity: 6 days |
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| I highly doubt this girl is. She's actually very friendly and pretty. And a lot of her best friends are guys, which it's always good to have opposite-sex friends. And besides, I'd have no business going for her if I realized she was one. |
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Wurl 4.0 Level: 18 Posts: 121/244 EXP: 27558 For next: 2339 Since: 09-11-05 From: Illinois: Land of Eternal Desert Since last post: 11 hours Last activity: 10 hours |
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| Sometimes it's just better to try and sieze the moment. I felt the same as you before, but I realized something else later. Though this girl could be different. |
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| Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - Lost Section - In a quandry; a love-related quandry |
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