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11-02-05 12:59 PM
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Scatterheart

Panser
Level: 29

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Since: 06-06-04
From: Sydney, Australia

Since last post: 17 hours
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Posted on 08-16-05 06:16 PM Link | Quote
It's a bit long, but here it is.

That MSN conversation with... "That Guy"

blaaaaah
blaaah?
yeah.. blaaah
what's up?
uhh.. the sky?
...what's the matter?

nonono.. wait.. the roof
umm.. idk.. stuff..
but yeah...
hard to explain....
about jayde i take it
??? hmmm.. kinda... but.... not at the same time....???
ah - kk
not helpful
well! tell me your woahs then
lol... as you said.. "these are my issues"
but i dunno if i could tell you....
lemmie guess - you still love jayde, but you're depressed because you feel it'll never happen... right?
thats definately one.... but there are a few, and sum concern you too.... lets guess them....
well lets see if u can neway...
you're jealous of me and jayde. that's an obvious one
yeah, guess more... ( i feel weird talkn bout it esp. with u but..tryn)
you should at least be glad with the fact that i make her happy... that's what you wanted, right?
yeah.... but.... its more complex then that...
if u can guess all my woes i'll spill the beans though.. even too you
why should i have to guess?
if you wanna tell me, just tell me, man
coz i cant tell.... i need an opening to express my feelings.. if u get me?
...kinda get you... but it's still weird
i dunno
and no hints from jayde......
all i can think of is that you want to get back with her
well thats one.... but now think of things more centred on u.....
uhmm... you wish i'd butt out?
if you feel that way... then i'm sorry, i'm not going to do that
lol.. in a way.. i do, but i know it aint hapning, coz just as i hav feelns 4 her, so do u.... but its more bout you as such.... not the both of you....
i know you think i'm only with her for sex
and dont get hurt by what i say.....
and it's completely opposite
hmm? all guys want that one way or anutha.. evn in the base of thier mind.... but no, its not that.. coz if i thought that i'd hav cut ur balls off by now
...right
well, what is it then?
it's not that i think u're a bad dude.. even though i'm wary as i don't know you... my trust thresh hold is very low atm, i dont trust basically, cept jayde... and its that kinda issue...
well duhh! ofcourse that'd be the case. you just broke up with her... why would anyone want to see the person they love with another person?
its not that, and i'll admit its like a knife twisting in my gut to see you'se together... but no.. i just don't trust ppl... as a whole...
and no matter what you say.. a part of me will always believe u are using her for either sex
or an emotional joy ride.....
or just as a way to get back at sum1 for sumn...

lol. well... obviously i can't convince you.
when i'm with her, i feel loved. and i'm very glad i make her happy
when i'm with her, she never seems stressed
yeah .. glad to see you noticed.. and were almost gunna try....
she is though.... you know it.. otherwise you wouldnt of written "seems"
the way i see it - is when you bring up her painful past, it only opens old wounds. the whole "psychiatrist" act is probably what hurts her
i don't bring up painful things when i'm with her just to start a conversation
it hurts me too, and recently i've been trying to stop doing that.... we've even had moments (dont get defensive) that seemed were out of our relationship... perfect in everyway...:
when i'm with her, i try to make every moment perfect. you really should get used to the fact that i'm always going to treat her right.
brb food
kk
back
i cant "get used to that fact".... bcoz i cant completely trust.... no personal thing with that (other personal stuff yeah) but not bout that....
and i know we can't be friends... for thhe sheer fact of where our hearts lie... but i'd rather not be enemies.. for jaydes sake....
yeah...
and look, its not that i dont NOT trust you.. its that i dont trust you.. its in d middle sumwhere.... i'm that kinda person.. u havnt harmed her so i dont hold a grudge... but yeah.... i'll keep my issues aside... i have been...
yeah. i've done nothing wrong, so you doing something about nothing would just be stupid
exactly....
if you're waiting for me to do something wrong, be expected to wait a very long time
aren't you leaving in 3 weeks?
LOL... i'm patient... but no i'm not "waiting".. wrong idea.... and its around 3 weeks... why?
*shrugs* it'll be alot easier then i s'pose
like... the whole jayde and i thing
yeah.. in a way... but i'm her best bud... so i'm still gunna be there.. if u gettme....
yeah. but you're only linguring on with the hope that you'll become more than friends.
it'll just hurt, dont'cha think?
i'll always "have her back" against anyone... and i'll always have that lingering feeling of wanting more.... but i'm not going to interfere in her happiness to get me happy.. cozit wouldnt be true happiness
believe me it hurts.... and i know the consequences of my pain.. but i cant stop my feelings.. just like you cant stop the rain... i can sheild myself from them a bit... but yeah....
and for you its the hardest thing to "share" her with sum1... but its not mine or your choice to dictate who she see's... and wateva ur belief.. me wantn too see her heaps in these 3 weeks is only coz i'll miss her, not coz i want her to stay away from u....
... you're still keeping her away from me though
we almost broke up over what you said to her
*shrugs*.. you didnt... and you can say i'm pulling you guys apart but i dont honestly care... u may think i'm heartless but shit.. she's my friend too.....
lol. you're greedy. if that seemed as offensive, i don't care
she had alot of missed calls from you last night. that's just posessive, and you're not even with her
greed doesnt come into it.. i might not see her for a year or more.. i'm savouring the moment.. getting memories to keep me going
lol. it's greed
you want her for yourself... even though she's with me
you have 2 and a half years of memories... it isn't mine or jayde's fault that you made them crappy ones
i was worried shitless bout her.... but y'know what.. *shrugs* sure i want her to be with me.. but only if she wants it.....
no.. its mine and jaydes fault some were crappy... not urs... but i'm not changing my plans too see her coz ur havn a fit bout not seein her as much 4 3 fuckn weeks.. THATS greed too
lol. dude... i'm in a relationship with her
so am i.. a friendship.. which has lasted a very long time.... and i'm aloud to have time with her... if you don't like it *shrugs* deal with it.....
this is funny stuff!
don't you think a relationship is more... of a priority? yet, you're begging her for more time. whenever i'm with her, you always ring... every 5 minutes to see if she's alright
she's alright! she never mentions suicide or anything when i'm with her
i dont give a damn... if you say she's safe.. my priority is her.. and its not every 5 minutes.... i start pranking at round 6:30 wen her dad starts hasseling me.... so i'm stll gunna do it....
and from 6:30 its every 1/2 hour....
...and how many missed calls were on her phone last night?
a bloody lot, that's how many
last night was different.. she promised something.... and i was worried.. of course i'm gonna call her.. i was trying to make sure she was fine... jesus
and as i said.. it goes back to trust....
i don't trust....
lol. "me" i know
and i don't care
good.. but just so you know... neither do i... but its not just "you"... so dont feel special.. i actually trust u more den i trust most ppl, bcoz jayde see's sumn in u.. evn if i dont...
why shouldn't i feel special?
i have a wonderful, nice, down-to-earth girlfriend
i was always thinking my first time would be with some dumb-ass slut... i feel so lucky to be with her
dont you dare try to rub that shit in.. me and jayde have had so many good memories wateva u feel doesnt come close to what we've had
you dont know half the stuff we've been through....
and it's not "gone" its still thier in our hearts and memories
which is what counts
and THATS why we can still be friends....
yet, you stress her out, yeah?
last night you did alot
over the phone...
i know... but she also knows she stressed me out.... and you have no idea wat that fone call was bout
nor should i care. but i start caring when she's hurt or stressed
you cant say crap like i stressed her out then say i dont care....
doesnt work....
i don't care what you talked about, but i do care that you made her feel that way when it waasn't needed
its contradictory
yeah it was needed.. it made her realise something..... lessons are learned through life.. and not all are pleasent....
and believe me, wen she got home we sorted it all out...
...she needed to become stressed out?
so she wasnt stressed
lol
uh-huh. and what exactly did that involve?
stress is a natural reaction.. es.. people need stress
lol.. if it concerned anythn it aint ya buisness neway..
but do u trust jayde that little?
not at all... i trust you that little though
good, youshould.. although.. i wouldnt try shit... not unless she welcomed it... i trust u that lil too btw
so finally now he says it
ohh no.. ive said it.. but still.... i dont trust.. at all.. u i trust a lil (as lil as it is) 4 jaydes sake
and yes i realise u are suspicious of me bein in the same bed.... and yes jayde and i hug.. giving kisses of comfort (friendship only, cheecks or forehead, so dont need to go nutters) but thats coz we care and feel for each other.....
she's told me.
keep talking man. i'll enjoy something to read when i get back. i'll be back in 10
well see?.... so what if i kiss her on the forehead coz shes sad or her hugging me coz im stressed... who cares.. but you do... i can tell, yes its jealosy, envy.. even hate towards me....
but i feel those towards you too... no matter wat happns, and you know why... but i tell jayde how i feel bout u.. both on a personal lvl (me/you) and how i feel bout u with her....
each is different... i know where my bias starts/ends... and i tell her whats what..... dont think i'm trying to "kill your chances"
LOL... but one thing... if i find out you've hurt her... expect a visit.. even if i have to fly from perth.. dont think i wont.... and it wont just be me....
even if you've hurt her just a little bit....
but no... i'm not trying to scare you... actions occur and situations appear.. you may hurt her.. completely against your will.. and i understand that... but SHE is my all.. if she hurts so do i....
and jayde knows wat i mean... ask her if i keep my promises... for this i promise you....
NEXT TOPIC however.....
jayde tells me she told you all about the abortion... do you know what kind of pain either of us felt during that?.. only one other thing has hurt more... and that was losing her....the point is... we've been through everything together... and i'm sure wen we r old we'll sit back and think of the good and bad times... no matter how "we" ended.. or if we get back together.. is irrelevant... we have a bond more powerful that just mere friends or even old lovers....
but we have those too...
that situation among others is one reason i can never forget what jayde means to me.. she owns a part of my soul.... she is a part of me... as i said.. if she hurt so do i....
yet do you see me coming after you with all the hurt you've caused for her?
and yes.. i kept typing
yeah.. thanks
no.. because it's none of your business.... but because of our ties... i have promised her and myself to keep her safe.. no matter the cost to myself....
i would consider laying my life down for her a small cost.. can you honestly say the same thing?
yep! i can. ...this has me thinking of another matter
you killing yourself
what were you trying to prove?
exactly..... my (attempted) killing myself.... i wasnt proving anything.. i was in despair... i no longer am in that kind of place... but yes.. indirectly it proved several things....
to myself and her....
lol. you wanted to see if she cared for you that much?
it hurt her... what were you expecting?
no.. not at all....
of course i knew it would hurt... but when in despair you dont think of others.. thats the point....
but she proved to me it wasnt the way... which is why i have the safety of knowing she wont do anything... to her it proved other things.. but yes to me.. (unintentionally) it proved she cared.. but i knew that...
... any more questions bout my sanity or otherwise??
having a nice chat?
newayz.. i gtg
k man
...you still there?

The following message could not be delivered to all recipients:
...you still there?

...Thus ends the wonderful conversation with... "That guy"





What's this guy on about?
It's my turn to look after Jayde...he's long gone.

Today was awesome! Last night, we were doing our usual "stuff" *You can now think dirty if you want*, and he started sending threatening messages to my mobile phone. My phone was out in the living room, and my brother saw the messages, and answered to him. I think he wanted to fight me or something.

She got really stressed, and wanted to see her best friend. I went with her, but as soon as we got to her car, she cried...terribly.
I felt so useless and angry. I wanted to teach this guy a lesson for making her feel that way.

So! Her friend recomended she staying with me the night. She did.
I only have a single bed, so I slept on the floor. She was relaxed that night. I made her feel good.
Ash (her ex) was sending messages apologising for everything to her mobile, but she just ignored them.
Ash thought she was sleeping at Jayde's best friend's house, so that sorted stuff out.
I told her I loved her today, and she said she loved me too!
We decided to go to the beach an hours drive away, and we strolled along it...it was really nice.
We had lunch at Pizza Hut Resturant, where it's like "all you can eat", and we got stuffed!
We're planning on going camping, road trips, and other "adventures" where we can spend time together. This is going so great! I'm so happy!!!
The only thing I'm scared of is Ash's actions when she gets home. I'm sick of him making her feel like crap. She told me she doesn't even know why she got with him in the first place, as he's always been like that.
I'm really proud of myself that I can make her happy. She really deserves it!

As I've said earlier:
"In three weeks, it'll be so much better"
She won't have anything to worry about, so she'll be able to spend as much time as she wants with me.
Dark Vampriel

Lynel
"Life is just a dream on the way to death."
Level: 57

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Since: 08-29-04
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Posted on 08-17-05 12:41 AM Link | Quote
That jackass needs to learn to stop harrassing her. I mean you could have gone to the police to show them those threat messages he sent you to try and get him into trouble. We have a guy who's ex lives with her parents across the street from us and he's been fucking stalking her! I mean lately he's been driving by on his motorcycle, revving it up really loud and taking off. Ever since my mom called the cops to report the disturbince and the cop talked to him when he called over there since she went to talk to them about him. He hasn't done it yet but we think he's laying low for a while. That's what Ash reminds me of is that guy.
Danielle

Local Moderator
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Posted on 08-17-05 03:01 AM Link | Quote
It's hard to follow who's saying what.. but yeah he sounds like he can't let go. I hope she takes the proper steps to getting rid of him. I don't think you need to make him your business, since it doesn't seem like he cares much what you want.
One thing I thought of though.. what has she told him about the direction of their.. friendship? I mean, she needs to tell him to butt out, not you. If she's with you, it's important that she tells him that and that he lets it be, or else he's going to remain a problem. I don't know how you can stand him and his.. slight obsession with her.. that's awkward.
Shadow Red

Red Koopa
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Posted on 08-17-05 08:06 AM Link | Quote
I'd wouldnt get worked up about it, I mean whos the one with her? You

Also I wouldnt show it affects me much, I mean people do tend to get a little obsessive during and after relationships.

I'd just sit back and wait three weeks instead of causing further drama. Yeah thats the last thing anyone needs.
Seph2k4

Bob-Omb
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Posted on 08-17-05 09:21 AM Link | Quote
My latest "confession" that I made in that new thread I posted pretty much speaks for the lack of opposite sex relationships that I've had. I expressed my love and interest to this one girl, and at the end of it, things seemed like they were swinging in my direction and I felt like I was this: ---- close to obtaining the one thing I haven't had in a long time: a good, strong, healthy relationship... but then the next day, when I was so sure and confident that I would get it all, the unthinkable happened: that this girl not only had an interest in some other guy, but this "other guy" felt the same way about her apparently, meaning I had no shot in hell of getting my wish. Fortunately, it was held off for a few days (over a 3 day weekend, giving me an extra day of torement over the infatuous situation), but when it finally happened, the two getting together and everything... I felt like my sweet and sour side was vastly falling apart, with no one to pick up the pieces. And I don't know if I'm the same loser guy I say I am when expressing my feelings towards the subject, or am just going for the wrong girls thereof. It could be a matter of both, or maybe there are girls out there interested in me... I just never saw of it. In short, I just don't know what to make of the whole situation. Maybe it just wasn't meant for me...

But regardless, I do not emotionally fit to embark in any future girlfriend endaveurs as I fear I'll be seeing the same things over again. There's life for me... sucking up all the glory from an empty spotlight which shines over me... or maybe it's over someone else, I dunno...


(edited by Seph2k4 on 08-17-05 12:27 AM)
Dark Vampriel

Lynel
"Life is just a dream on the way to death."
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Since: 08-29-04
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Posted on 08-17-05 11:04 AM Link | Quote
There have been times that I think I should go bi or to just fuck it all and go out with someone I don't really like in that way. Seeing as I hate being single.
Grey the Stampede

Don't mess with powers you don't understand.

And yes. That means donuts.
Level: 82

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Since: 06-17-04
From: Kingston, RI, USA, Earth

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Posted on 08-17-05 09:44 PM Link | Quote
Nobody needs a partner to validate their existence, DV. Find yourself before you find someone else.


(edited by Guilty Grey X on 08-17-05 12:44 PM)
Dark Vampriel

Lynel
"Life is just a dream on the way to death."
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Since: 08-29-04
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Posted on 08-18-05 01:07 AM Link | Quote
I knew that.
Scatterheart

Panser
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Since: 06-06-04
From: Sydney, Australia

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Posted on 08-19-05 07:05 PM Link | Quote
Argh! I feel like shit!
The relationship's going great! And Ash has gone away for 5 days.

What's the problem you might be asking?

Well... This is probably going to be too much information... Good thing you're all across the other side of the world.

I'm a guy who gets aroused very easily. When Jayde and I kiss, I get a little visit by the thing in my pants.
Tonight though... It was really hard to get it up. I have no idea why.
I'm scared she thinks it's her fault, but it's not. I'm not sure what it is. I think it's me worrying too much or something, I dunno.
Tonight, we kinda had sex, too! It was my first time... But I feel really bad, because it slowly went down.

Has this happened to anyone else before? Is there any way to get over it? I never ever have any problems like these usually...
Shadow Red

Red Koopa
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Posted on 08-19-05 09:25 PM Link | Quote
Ah, I cant say i've had your specific experience..

I dunno sometimes your just not in the mood. The only thing that come close to that is not finishing off. Thats happend to me before. After like 40-50 minutes and it was really pissing me off. Weird stuff happens sometimes man.

Dont worry, first time always sucks. Its awkward as hell.


My advice would just be to re-coup for awhile. Wait a day or two and do it again. Just make up for last time
Scatterheart

Panser
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Posted on 08-19-05 09:34 PM Link | Quote
I'll try, man.
For the little time we were doing it... "WOW!"
It feels so different... Pretty nice.
I don't think I'll cum too quickly though... Hope not, anyway.

Maybe I was scared? I dunno. I hope I get over it fast, though.
...Don't go thinking I'm greedy, lol. I just want her to feel like she's pleased me for once - not that I care about myself at times like those.

*Has skilled hands and tongue* so I've been told.

...It's gotta be that I was scared, right?
Shadow Red

Red Koopa
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Posted on 08-19-05 09:48 PM Link | Quote
Maybe you were scared, maybe you werent. That doesnt really matter.

I just get in the zone when im doing it. Its hard to explain, just try to concentrate on one thing and one thing only...her orgasm. This will ultimately lead to two happy people.

She'll end up looking at you like this:

This isnt like the sex talk forums so im not gonna start talking about G-spots.

Just be confident in whatever you do with her. Thats all there is to it really man. If you wanna surprise her then do it. I'm sure youll have fun


(edited by Shadow Red on 08-19-05 12:48 PM)
(edited by Shadow Red on 08-19-05 12:49 PM)
(edited by Shadow Red on 08-19-05 12:50 PM)
Thayer

Fuzz Ball
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Posted on 08-21-05 06:29 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Guilty Grey X
Nobody needs a partner to validate their existence, DV. Find yourself before you find someone else.


Seriously true. Nice job, Grey. I don't understand why so many people lament not being in a relationship. It's true that it is nice to be in love with someone, have a girlfriend, etc., but being single definitely has its advantages. Why rush things?
Danielle

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Posted on 08-23-05 11:29 AM Link | Quote
+10 for Grey.
I'd say over half the people at my school are in relationships just to say they have a boy/girlfriend. What a waste, to be with someone like that when you really don't care about them.. why would you waste your time like that? Someone will come along that genuinly loves and cares, why suffer through a bunch of breakups before?
Peer pressure is too much sometimes, it seems.
Dark Vampriel

Lynel
"Life is just a dream on the way to death."
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Posted on 08-24-05 01:17 AM Link | Quote
See Grey you can be proud of me that my new friend David was going to put in a word about me to another friend of mine that is looking for a girlfriend. Even though I knew the person he was talking about I haven't really talked to him since 8th grade and I know Joe is a good guy. Basically I was like no seeing as I think it would be best for me, even though I don't like it, to be single for awhile. As what Matt did to me was un-called for and I haven't gotten to give him a piece of my mind yet: I'm a little unstable still. It wouldn't be right to be in a relationship now with the way I feel towards guys and not be acting like myself. As I can handle being friends with them but as far as dating goes I'm through for awhile before I really go insane.
Danielle

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Posted on 08-26-05 05:07 AM Link | Quote
Taking a break is good. You don't need to always have a boyfriend, especially when they all seem to turn out being jerks.. The right one will come around at some point, you don't have to go through a million klutz guys to find him.
Dark Vampriel

Lynel
"Life is just a dream on the way to death."
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Posted on 08-26-05 07:50 AM Link | Quote
Yeah David is one of the few guys that is actually honest! Too bad all guys aren't like that. Makes ya wonder what's wrong with guys these days about lying about everything. I know girls can be the same way. Sheesh, I can't believe Matt went to be such a dumbass and diss me for a whore, literally. From what I've heard is that Melissa likes to sleep around a lot.

Also I have no idea if I should be freaking out or not. Seeing as my friend Matt Davis (different Matt) dreamt about me last week wearing a red leather suit. O_o Dunno if he likes me or not but my best friend keeps saying that he does.
Bella

Ludwig Von Koopa
You're Gonna Love Me
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Posted on 08-27-05 05:44 AM Link | Quote
He probably does like you , if your friend knows him well then there's a possibility if the other Matt does.

It is good to take a break from the dating scene to have fun with the girlfriends and everything. It's a possibility you can find a very good guy when you least expect it . That's how it usually happends, it seems.
Dark Vampriel

Lynel
"Life is just a dream on the way to death."
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Posted on 08-30-05 12:10 PM Link | Quote
OMFG! Matt Ball moved and never told anyone. My friend from Georgia talked to him and I found out that way. She wasn't being nice while talking to him or text messaging him. I even called him up and he said he moved down there like three weeks ago. How is that even possible if my best friend saw him like two weeks ago? So now that I've talked to him and now have another guy telling me to not call them: well one saying not to call and another not to email. What's so wrong with me if I have guys treat me like this and I finally get ahold of them and they tell me to basically go fuck off?

Guys just need to fucking grow up and stop running away from problems. I do admit that some girls will act that way too.
Scatterheart

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Posted on 08-30-05 05:39 PM Link | Quote
Bah! To me, it seems that it's rare to find a nice girl. I'm lucky though, as I've found one.
I've been with three girls who were the "bad" type. Luckily, I didn't do anything with them. Who knows what I would've caught.


With my problem I've posted a few posts back.
Okay, we still havn't really had sex yet. I'm not on the edge of my seat waiting for it ofcourse. She's been touching me quite alot lately though. It sux that I can't return the favour, as it's kinda "that time of the month"

About a week ago, we tried having sex again, but my mind was all over the place again. I dunno, I just can't help it.
As she said though - It'll happen when it happens.

With the her touching me thing, I've learned to stop thinking 'bout crap, and just go with it. It's nice how she looks at me. I think she likes the faces I make.

Off of the topic of 'sex'

Her boyfriend's still stressing her out quite abit. She's sick at the moment, probably alot to do with stress. Last night she almost punched him because he was pissing her off!

It's really good to see that she's had enough of his bullshit.
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