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Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - Officer's Club - I'm putting on a mask. Expressionless, yet inside is someone who is troubled. | New poll | | |
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Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6431 days |
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You know why my name is Shyguy? I'll tell you. I have a mask. My mask says I never ever have any emotional hurt, like I'm always happy.
Behind the mask is someone highly emotional. Someone who is about to break down at the mere feeling of lonliness. Someone who gets in fits of rage of sorts sometimes over his own personality. As I bravely hold my mask up, I'm going about life the nicer way. The way that never even pays attention to my clinical depression. The way people like to see a person. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I really have a depression problem. I get really down at times when the time calls for it. Today, it was a stormy day, as I was sitting here in the living room on the computer. The storm went away, but the feelings of depression and lonliness still was with me. Sometimes, I can't stand myself. |
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MathOnNapkins 1100 In SPC700 HELL Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6431 days Last view: 6430 days |
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I may be going out on a limb but perhaps your depression is because you keep your emotions bottle up, as you put it? Yelling at someone when you're pissed off actually feels pretty good, I've found out. I used to bottle my anger up too, but now I just don't care anymore. | |||
Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6431 days |
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Your mask lacks effectiveness. Perhaps it needs refined. Go to any nearby blacksmith shops with elunium in your inventory and expect you'll need to shell out a little bit of zeny. | |||
Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6431 days |
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Originally posted by Thayer ....... what? |
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Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6431 days |
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Originally posted by ShyguyOriginally posted by Thayer I'm really quite serious. |
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Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6431 days |
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I hardly know what you mean, but I'll try to make sense out of it.
If it's that one spell of going into a fit about IRC, then yes. I kinda flown the coop there. Sometimes, when enough people insult me, I get kinda...... itchy. I don't really like it. I probably shouldn't have publicized my feelings toward IRC issues, but that's the past. And I only did that like.... a small portion of the time I was ever here. MOSTLY, my mask works. |
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Black Lord + Flurry Since: 11-17-05 From: Where indians still roam... Last post: 6432 days Last view: 6433 days |
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I almost wish I still had my mask.
Actually Shyguy, as bad as I don't want to admit it, me and you are quite a bit alike. Hard to believe no. Only I dropped my mask last year, and even though there are times I still had it, it feels good to not be hiding anymore. People know who I really am, people don't confuse me for being happy, honestly, I was probably the most emotionally 'messed up' kid in our town. People honestly fucked with my emotions. Oh, and get rid of your mask as soon as possible, because if you don't, there are gonna be some really complicated trust issues coming up in your life. While hiding behind the mask may be satisfying for you, it will provide the illusion to those who care for you that everything is fine. And then when you tell them that it is not fine..... all hell will break loose... trust me, it happened to me. |
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Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6431 days |
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Originally posted by Shyguy Why are you obsessed with this? P.S. Black Lord has nice advice, I guess. You should listen to him. (edited by Thayer on 01-02-06 05:58 PM) |
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Tarale 2710 Affected by 'Princess Bitch-Face Syndrome' ++++!! Persona non grata Since: 11-17-05 From: Adelaide, Australia Last post: 6430 days Last view: 6430 days |
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Everybody wears masks. In fact, people wear different masks at different occasions.
It sounds to me though that you are trying to wear a mask all the time, for all occasions. That's the same as bottling things up. And that's not good. Eventually things get to a point with that where you can't bottle it all up anymore. If you are having trouble with things, you need to tell a friend or somebody you know will support you. You don't have to burden them with everything, but you can't just pretend that everything is fine all the time either. |
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Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6431 days |
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Originally posted by ShyguyOriginally posted by Thayer If it's past the safe limit, you can go ahead and go to comodo(Right at the top of the volcano), she charges more, but never fails. Be careful up the stairs, some of the boards are loose, I found my greaves slipping on the third one. So, you have a Façade? Yeah, you and about 6,489,248,924 people. Congrats. |
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MathOnNapkins 1100 In SPC700 HELL Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6431 days Last view: 6430 days |
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Originally posted by CrimsonGX Your cynicism and that of others is much appreciated in the Officer's Club. *rolls eyes*. (edited by MathOnNapkins on 01-04-06 05:51 AM) |
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Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6431 days |
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Originally posted by CrimsonGX Anyway, yeah. I guess I should unmask, but then I'll come off as whiny and kinda sad about everything. I guess I'll exp |
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Tarale 2710 Affected by 'Princess Bitch-Face Syndrome' ++++!! Persona non grata Since: 11-17-05 From: Adelaide, Australia Last post: 6430 days Last view: 6430 days |
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Originally posted by Shyguy Now, I think it's the Ancient Greeks that say it best here: Originally posted by Ancient Greeks Maybe you should try to find balance and moderation in your unmasking/masking With a little balance, moderation and self-control, you should be fine |
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Valcion Knuckle Joe too much high power man Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6430 days Last view: 6430 days |
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I was the same way, at one point. if i had my old LJ i'd point out one of the million entries where i was extremely emo and depressed over some stupid reason.
This is going to sound harsh, but you dont' have clinical depression. You're probably just making a mountain out of a molehill. Stop that. Right now. It doesn't help any. (although if you do have clinical depression, it would be wise to seek some sort of professional help) its always good to get out and try and findw ays to make you feel less depressed. If its lonliness, try and get out there and make some friends somehow. Its hard, yeah, and if you don't drive its even harder to get out there (although i'm not sure if you do or not). And don't go with the mindset of making friends. Then you try too hard and make things harder for yourself. The trick is to go to enjoy yourself and have a good time, just like everyone else is doing. It's pretty much how i solved my problems. As long as you talk to them and stuff... you should be fine. Relax a little. It'll take some time, of course. But once things start moving for you, and you start building some good friendships in your area... you'll find peopole that'll like you, mask on, or off. you'll find people that you can have deep conversations with, and perhaps it could be just another outlet for you to get things out to. And really, if you put what i'm saying to Thayer's/Crim's comments... they make perfect sense =P |
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