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| Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - Officer's Club - Adopted? |
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Dark Bahamut Octorok                 Since: 11-14-06 From: Santa Barbara, CA Last post: 6280 days Last view: 6279 days |
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| I know this isn't the problem for everyone but for me, yes.
I'm adopted by the white family and then I grew up with them. I felt different from my real family because sometimes being adopted is hard for me. I found out my real dad left the family after I was adopted and he blames my real mom because he thought she did it on purpose. It wasn't my mom's fault because we had 6 children in our family that she had to take care of. So, me and my younger sister were adopted. Then I finally got in touch with my real sister and she told me that my real dad is dying of alcholic, due the depression of me and my younger sister been seperate from them. I kinda feel weird because I really missed being with my real family. Because they are my blood. Have anyone here is adopted so I don't have to feel like I'm the only one? I know this isn't an approriate topic to be in here. Mods, you can change or delete this. Thanks.... |
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Vyper Kodondo Raging Venom      Since: 11-18-05 From: Final Fantasy Fire Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6296 days |
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Actually this does fit here 
Anyway I can't say myself because I'm not adopted, but at least your mom did what she thought was the best option for you. I say be happy that you have a family that can support and take care of you. You were adopted, yes, but think of your blood parents as your surrogates. |
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Aiya Poppy Bros. Jr Bah. >B( Since: 11-28-05 Last post: 6280 days Last view: 6279 days |
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| I was adopted by my stepdad when I was 14. I know it's not quite the same situation as you are in, but I think I may understand how you're feeling, to a small extent.
My situation: My stepdad and my mom have been married since I was one. I've never really gotten to know my dad much at all, because he's a very.. quiet person. Intensely private, and such. It didn't help that he lived roughly 4 hours away from where I lived growing up, and that he never wanted to make the time to come see me, and often wasn't around when I'd go down to visit him and my grandparents. He smokes, and it's taking a hard tole on his health. It's been really hard for me to accept that he doesn't really want me to be a big part of his life. Harder still when I know my older brother communicates easily with him, often. But my brother lived with him for a while when he was a teenager, so I guess they formed a stronger bond than I'll ever be given a chance to form with him. I've tried, but my dad doesn't seem to be open to the idea. I don't know if that will ever change. My stepdad has basically been my father since I was a wee one. It made sense to me when he adopted me, even if we weren't really getting along very well when it happened. Differences in personality, and such. I knew I might not be happy with him at the time, but that he had always been there for me when I needed him to be, and that that wouldn't ever change. I made the decision, worried about what my dad would think, but never actually talked to him about it. He just signed the papers and didn't say anything, as usual. *shrug* =/ I was young when I made the choice, but I haven't regretted it yet. If you don't mind my asking, how old were you when you were adopted? It sounds to me like you're not angry about your mother's decision to have your sister and yourself put up for adoption, which I think is admirable. If you have a chance to get to know your blood relatives, give it a try. You don't [Edit: Oh dear, I can't believe I left that word out. ><] have to decide which 'family' you love more, or whatever. You (might?) have the chance to have a relationship with both, and I think that's pretty awesome. You mentioned that your father is dying due to something related to alcoholism. Do you know what that is? Or just a general knowledge of the fact that he's dying? That must be really, really tough to deal with, either way.. I hope you realize that it's not your fault. (I say this because you mentioned that it was because of his depression over losing you and your sister.) =/ And yeah, this topic is indeed fine in the Officer's Club. heheh (edited by Aiya on 11-15-06 05:27 PM) |
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Dark Bahamut Octorok Since: 11-14-06 From: Santa Barbara, CA Last post: 6280 days Last view: 6279 days |
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| Thanks for your kind words.
Well, my younger brother was also adopted too. He sees his real family more often but that's fine with me. It doesn't bothers me much. I still talk to my real sister via texting and we visit each other, which I'm glad. Well, my dad did it because he thought I was dead (yes, I know that it's weird) because he haven't heard from me since 19 years. I'm 22 if you want to know. So, I fetl mad at my real dad because he was doing stupid thing such as drinking. He abused my mom (that's what I heard from my sister) and my mom loves him no matter what. Whatever my dad do, my mom still loves him. I'm still mad inside for that. I was adopted about few weeks old when I was born. I was premature and I was 6 months old, I think. I'll check with my foster mom about that. Stayed in the hospital for few months until I fully can survive. Here's the interesting fact. My family illegally crossed the border from Mexico and then I was in my mother's tummy. I was few hours to be born. My dad got shot in the leg by the cops (scary) and then if I didn't make it.... I would be dead. I thank god and my family to make me alive. |
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Yoronosuku Toss Tortoise Since: 11-17-05 From: Massachusetts is my new home.. Last post: 6279 days Last view: 6279 days |
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My half brother lives with adoptive parrents (his biological dad is my actual dad), and my big sister supposedly comes from another mom, but she's live with mine and me all my life (so, I think, my mom actualy adopted her after my dad left us...) and my uncle Ken/Chen is an adopted Chinese. Being adopted might mean you have a crazy family life, but it also means that you have more people you can count on like siblings  |
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Kyo_Starr Octorok  Since: 11-16-06 From: Amestris Last post: 6279 days Last view: 6279 days |
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I'm really sorry to hear about your dad... but it's not your fault, whatever happens. If you're happy, then he ought to be glad for you (but that's another matter...) You can at least be thankful you have a family who loves you, blood relatives or not... Sorry you have to go through this, I wish I could help  *hugs* |
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Dark Bahamut Octorok Since: 11-14-06 From: Santa Barbara, CA Last post: 6280 days Last view: 6279 days |
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| Sorry if I had to bump this old thread.... however I got some news about my dad (I mention little about him on the early topic)
My real dad passed away on Christmas Eve (yes, I know its two months ago but then I forgot about this topic I still have) He died from alcoholic poisoning. My real sisters told me about his death. I was so deavasted (sp?) about it. She told me that he drank so much alcohol over the years and he have those weird blister on his legs. If you touch it it'll pop like that and you can die from it. That what my sister told me. Mind you, My sister speaks Spanish and she doesn't speak English well and so she might be wrong in some way. Anyways, I felt it's like my fault that I haven't talk to him over the years because of seperation from birth from adoption. Last time I saw my dad when I was age 5. Now, I'm 22. My sisters and my foster parent said to me that it wasn't my fault. But I do feel it's like my fault. Pretty hard for me T_T. |
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