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| Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - Story Forum - who is dan bakitus |
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Teddylot Bouncy                   Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6320 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| Teddylot stood on the tips of his toes on a bar stool and a couple of phone books to get his nose over a newly acquired (required?) aquarium. It completes the room, apparently. He peered into his contorted reflection in the placid salt water. He had made the virtual habitat virtually perfect for anything that'd be forced to live there. Plenty of blue/green pebbles scattered on the see-through, “sea” floor, a couple of prosthetic plant life, a lava mountain that spurted bubbles, a chest that spurted bubbles, a yellow submarine that spurted bubbles, an old-school "20,000 Leagues under the Sea" scuba diver that didn’t spurt bubbles, and an Aquaman play toy. Aquaman completed the tank, apparently.
There was something missing, however, and that was about to be remedied. Teddylot pulled out from his pocket a plastic bag full of a myriad of tiny Goldfish. He dumped them in, one by one, into the tank until they were all swimming around it. But there was something peculiar about the fishes' actions ... The teddy bear hopped off of the mound of textbooks, sending them flying off of the stool, and shuffled throughout the house to find Zap. He found him eventually in his makeshift lab he created underneath the house ala Dexter. Circuitry and machines, test tubes and gadgets scattered the seemingly endless laboratory where Zap went to work re-discovering electricity, finding the perfect equation for peace (which actually turned out to be a number ... pi), or chilling out and eating pizza with his peeps from MIT, Caltech, or Tokyo U while comparing notes on the best ways of taking over the world or something … all in theory, please. Zap was, as usual, pandering away on an unidentifiable gadget that seemed to do nothing, but could probably do anything ... except defy the laws of physics, that is. Zap took a quick breath, adjusted his glasses, and then flipped his overly long bangs out of his eyes ... adjusting properly with his hand. This act had to be performed quite repetitively; not only because his hair was too long and his glasses ill-fitted, but also because he repetitively bopped his head to a song blasting through his wireless headphones, a modded pair of humongous music-blasters with the equivalent of an ipod inside of them. Teddylot took no time in getting the kid genius's attention. He ripped the headphones right from around his ears, having Zap lose his balance and land with a thump on the Swiffer-cleaned floor. Zap adjusted his glasses and flipped his hair, while setting himself on his elbows and cracking his back. Teddylot peered over him from behind. Teddylot: Zap ... something’s up with the fish I got. They're just floating their in the tank ... belly up. Zap: What? I didn't think it was possible for you to kill them that quickly. I mean, I knew you'd kill them eventually, but-- Teddylot: Killed them?!?!? Oh no ... kill me, I'm a murder. Zap: An eye for an eye, hmm? Pretty old testament, but I'd never perform the act over some silly-- Teddylot: Can we eat them then? Zap: *startled* what?! NO! They're going down the toilet. Teddylot: Well, would you at least come take a look at them before you make a silly, brash decision like that. Maybe they're just napping. Zap: Well, if they are ... eating them would've been even worse. Teddylot: At least, I didn't want to send them to the sewers ... or maybe we could've ... they would've been the Teenage Mutant Ninja Fish or something ... cool like that. Zap fixed himself up, brushed himself off, and followed Teddylot back through the winding hollows of the laboratory. They proceeded into the basement, then to the rée de chausée as the French like to call it. They found the aquarium tank by the window getting a decent amount of sunlight with a decent tan along with that. Zap lifted Teddylot by the scruff of his neck so that the bear could see through the glass as well. Zap: Teddylot ... why'd you put Goldfish in the aquarium? Teddylot: Well, I was going to put a shark, and octopus and a handful of those cool (yet lame) albino frogs in the tank, too, but the shark and octopus were too big so I dumped them in the lake, and I lost all of the albino frogs whilst playing real-live action FROGGER!!! with Twister. Somewhere else in the house, Twister sneezed. Teddylot: We could never get the frogs all the way across the highway. After that, we would've been home free because I don't see why frogs die when they fall into a river. You think the logs come from a couple of angry beavers upstream? 'Cause that's what I’m thinking. Zap: ... right, that's ... swell. Frogger? Teddylot: Yesh, real-live action. Zap: ... wow. *shakes his head violently* But wait, wait ... you put Goldfish into the tank. Goldfish? ... the snack food? Teddylot: But they always smile back. Zap: Bupbupbupbupbupbupbupbupbup ... bup. No. That's horrible. Teddylot: You know, now that I look at them again ... they're pretty quaint just floating there. Zap: ... yeah, right before they dissolve. Teddylot: Can we eat them, then? Zap: Yeah, if you like your Goldfish soggy. Whatever … just please … clean the tank or something. Teddylot: Before or after they dissolve? Zap peered inside the tank once more ... the fish were pretty quaint. Zap: ... after. Meanwhile, I'm going to properly saturate the lake so that the shark and squid-- Teddylot: Octopus ... although a squid would've been sweeter. Zap: --And the octopus ... have a fighting chance. Zap snatched the headphones out of Teddylot's paws and went back into the lab to get a couple dozen "My First Chemistry Set" sets. He promptly returned, arms full and unable to see where he was going. In the meantime, Teddylot just plastered his face against the glass of the tank making odd faces at the goldfish, old school deep sea diver ala "2000 Leagues under the Sea" that didn’t spurt bubbles, and Aquaman. Teddylot: Yes, that's right ... smile back at your daddy, punk fishies. |
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Kirbynite Phan Phan  I'm sick of being bogged down by homework!!    Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6299 days Last view: 6285 days |
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| And just then, there came a rapping, a rapping on Teddylot's front door.
Outside the door stood a round creature that was only a bit taller than Teddylot. It seemed to only have two arm flaps and a pair of oval feet for limbs. Kirbynite: Oy! Teddylot! I know you're there. It was the owner of floating island they were all living on. Kirbynite is normally a cheerful being, but he has his moments of irritation. Kirbynite: What's with all these letters, huh? There's letter for every person living in my house, all of them saying "who is dan bakitus". And don't say it ain't you. Your name's on the from addresser part! |
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Teddylot Bouncy Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6320 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| Well, if there was a rapping, a rapping on Teddylot's front door ... it was pretty poor freestyle in the bear's egoful opinion. He unstuck his face from the require aquarium and quickly pinpointed the source as one of the Jehova's Witnesses' latest ploys used on gangster players from the hood ... like himself. Teddylot knew that ignoring the rapping, the rapping at his door would be the perfect solution to his cultish solicitors, but he figured events would accelerate themselves if he put to use a ploy of his own.
Teddylot: Nobody's home. From the other side of the front door, a muffled, but still audible "Nobody's home" was heard. The conversation, seemingly in contradiction with the original voice, continued as a new conversator joined the apparent nobody. Twister: What are you talking about, you stupid bear? Teddylot: There are Witnesses at the door ... they have God-given evidence that I did something wrong ... Twister: Jehova's Witnesses? Teddylot: Yesh, the cultish kind. Twister: On Neo Grape Gardens? Teddylot: They's gots angel wings ... god-given angel wings. Twister: *pause* Stupid bear. From the outside, the shuffling of feet and then a thump on the ground could be heard. Teddylot: Don't do it ... you'll regret ever opening the door to a Witness ... it means you'll have to close it again ... in their face. The shuffling feet didn't appear to pay attention to nobody's voice as they continued to scuffle towards the door. A few moments later, the door opened revealing an obscure pun in God's creation (hey!) Twister's long dreadlocks defied gravity and went in every which direction it wanted ... at least it followed entropy. Twister wore a groggy face that appeared to have just been woken up by the rapping, the rapping on Teddylot's door. He was still in his flanel pajama bottoms, extra-large sleeping shirt, and bunny slippers proving that he was woken up too early at noonish. After looking at his own eye-level for a while, Twister looked downward, and his eyes brightened when he noticed who was at the door. The stumps were iconic enough for him to recognize the little dreamlander. Twister: Oh ... it's you! |
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Kirbynite Phan Phan I'm sick of being bogged down by homework!! Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6299 days Last view: 6285 days |
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| A slight smile appeared on Kirby's face.
Kirbynite: Eh heh.  Hey.. sorry to have woken you up..
Kirbynite leans backwards and tried to look at the jungle in the distance. He noted the direction of the sun.. Kirbynite: In the afternoon. 
The pink Dreamlander felt bad about the rapping, the rapping on Teddylot's door, but he couldn't let that stop him from wanting answers. He holds up a small stack of papers; some being ripped envelopes, the rest were sheets of folded paper. Kirbynite: I wanted to know what's up with this junk mail Teddylot sent everyone. My curiosity's piqued enough to not have me just toss it out. |
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Teddylot Bouncy Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6320 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| Teddylot: A climax in curiousity, you say?
Teddylot horizontally poked his head from outside of the frame of the door on the left side. He gave Kirbynite a vicarious "wait two ticks or I'll hunt you down and give you a wedgie" look and pulled his back from wear it came. What would be most interesting to watch is how the bear would give the dreamlander a wedgie as Kirb didn't wear any underwear. An experiment for later, I'm sure. Two ticks later, the bear returned from the right side of the door frame with a sack of letters over his shoulder that tripled his size, but not his mass (different densities, you see.) Teddylot stood in the door frame and pulled a 180 to face Twister straight in the shins. He looked up, paused ... Teddylot: CUT YOUR HAIR, BEATNICK!!! Teddylot moved out of the way just in time for him to miss being slammed by the door. He's had experience, you see, and a teddy bear with experience ... is a unique thing to say the least. He dashed a few meters to get the excitement out of his system and then slowed down to his regular pace, still with his bag of letters over his shoulders, waiting for that slowpoke Kirbynite to follow his three-piece suit. Teddylot: I never figured you be a Witness, Kirb. But now that you are, I'll have to start slamming the door in your face more often ... procedure's sake, I knew you'd understand. |
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Schweiz oder etwas [12:55] (Dr_Death16); I swear, the word drama needs to be stricken from the dictionary, for I've heard it so many times, it will permanently be imprinted on my brain  Since: 11-17-05 From: Kingston, Rhode Island Last post: 6284 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| From across the nightmare came a cackling, audible only to the residents of a very small, dark room in the depthy shadows. They were quite depthful, those shadows. Very in depth, you see. Depthsome.
A pair of spectacles shined in front of the eyes of a shadowy figure, his hands folded across his mouth contemplatively as he leaned over a desk that'd be quite ominous with some better lighting in the room. He watched Kirbynite and Teddylot's exchange on a small television, clearly observing and invading privacy in a very unmodest form. I bet he got free cable from it, too. He held in the dull glow of the television a sheet of paper, folded in envelope form but outstretched to view in the dim light of the dark cubicle. It contained a small, seemingly insignificant message... "Who is Dan Bakitus?" Who, indeed... ???: "Who is this Dan Bakitus fellow, they ask... Who. Perhaps the question is not so much "who" as it is "why"... A very interesting, and far more complex question. Oh, how little they know thus far." He got up from his desk and turned tail to the television, a lock of long, blonde hair shimmering before dissolving into the shadows. The television flickered as he left the room, and shut off as his silhouette appeared in an open doorway, and disappeared with a slam. |
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Kirbynite Phan Phan I'm sick of being bogged down by homework!! Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6299 days Last view: 6285 days |
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| Kirbynite: Witness? Wait.. no.. I haven't joined Jenova's Witness. If I did, there would've been a guy with silvery hair lurking inside your house, yo.
Kirbynite glanced over at Teddylot's house. Just to make sure. Kirbynite: Um.. what's with the bag, guy?  |
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Teddylot Bouncy Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6320 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| Teddylot: Guy? My name isn't Guy. >( A case of mistaken identity, I'm sure.
Teddylot stopped and then placed the bag at his feet. Teddylot: What's with the bag, you ask? Teddylot stared at and scrutinized the bag for a while in his casual "Thinker"-like pose, all leading to just a blank look. Teddylot: I dunno ... seems a regular, old, filled-to-the-brim bag to me. |
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Kirbynite Phan Phan I'm sick of being bogged down by homework!! Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6299 days Last view: 6285 days |
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| Kirbynite stopped walking.
Kirbynite: ... Then where are we going? |
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Teddylot Bouncy Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6320 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| Teddylot: To the Island's Edge!!! Daring, I know. | |||
JDavis Nintendo Fanboy Local Mod Affected by 'The Golden Power' +  Since: 11-17-05 From: Ada, OK, USA Last post: 6298 days Last view: 6286 days |
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| Little did Teddylot or Kirbynite realize that there was a dark figure flying towards them at great speed. Once, he had been the ruler of an interplanetary empire based on fear and corruption. He was responsible for a million tragedies, and tortures so gruesome I dare not write about them. He had been pure evil.
Now, however, he was largely comedic relief. Draco: BAG! *swipes down, grabbing the unmanned (and unbeared) bag* |
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Kirbynite Phan Phan I'm sick of being bogged down by homework!! Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6299 days Last view: 6285 days |
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| Kirby turned his gaze to his right, noticing the top of a cloud past a hill.
Kirbynite: And then what-- HEY! Kirbynite looked dully at Draco swooping away. Kirbynite: Seriously, what was in that bag? Kirbynite looked at Teddylot, assuming the bear was still there. |
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JDavis Nintendo Fanboy Local Mod Affected by 'The Golden Power' + Since: 11-17-05 From: Ada, OK, USA Last post: 6298 days Last view: 6286 days |
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| Draco landed next to the stuffed bear and dreamlander, dropping the bag back where it was.
Draco: Aw, it's just paper. I thought you might have had some... The camera suddenly zoomed in on Draco's mouth, so that it filled the screen. Draco: Little smokies. The view then returned to normal. |
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Teddylot Bouncy Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6320 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| Teddylot: There are no LITTLE SMOKIES! Only pigs in blankets. Now, if you'll excuse me, ladies. I have some mail to exp Teddylot threw the bag back over his shoulder and made his way towards the Island's Edge!!!. 'Cause he's intense like that. |
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Schweiz oder etwas [12:55] (Dr_Death16); I swear, the word drama needs to be stricken from the dictionary, for I've heard it so many times, it will permanently be imprinted on my brain Since: 11-17-05 From: Kingston, Rhode Island Last post: 6284 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| The completely unknown figure continued to watch Teddylot and Kirbynite intently, taking a look at the array of buttons on his desk...
???: "Hm, hm, hm... Yes, Teddylot and Kirbynite. Keep going. Soon you will find out the secret." He pressed a small button, and a small hole to nowhere appeared in front of the two walkers as they went towards the edge of Neo Grape Gardens without a care in the world. It was a trap! For sure. All that needed to happen was for them to walk straight into it. It's not like the hole was too small for anything more than a foot being stuck for a few seconds to happen, of course. At least, the dark and shadowy fellow hoped. This would be a test of their intelligence. If they walked into the hole, they'd be far too stupid for him to deal with. It was right in front of them, and it was blatantly not there before... The only thing stopping them from walking over and straight past it would be their dumb curiousity. Perhaps he had to make things harder... He pressed another button, and a small wooden sign labeled "Candy!" appeared in front of the hole with an arrow pointing downward. This would be good. |
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Teddylot Bouncy Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6320 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| Teddylot stopped at the foot of the mysterious hole ... because it actually hat a foot. Being a hole, Teddylot was very tempted to just jump into its unbeknownst depths, but he was on a noble mission ... He wasn't quite sure what it was yet, but he'd figure that out on the fly ... McFly ... Back to the Future ... 1-3 ...
The bear, despite the hole acting as sweet, sweet candy in more than one way, was able to fight his addiction of exploring strange holes to continue his treck towards the island's edge. He didn't realize it was that far away 'cause it's taking an ungodly long time to get there. |
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Kirbynite Phan Phan I'm sick of being bogged down by homework!! Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6299 days Last view: 6285 days |
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| Kirbynite: Hey.. um.. Teddylot.. I know you noticed it, but there's a hole over here. And there's a sign that says candy.
Kirbynite picked up his pace. Kirbynite: I hope you guys didn't start digging another hole without telling me. 
And there it was. The edge of the island. The Island's Edge, if you will. There was nothing beyond it but clouds and.. well, the rest of the earth. But the earth was far below, and it'd be a painful way down. Unless you were cool. Or wear a red coat, in which you can land with no problems. Oh, and being a ninja. Or riding a lift. Okay, so there were plenty of non-painful ways down. But that's besides the point. There were a lot of fluffy white clouds. |
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Teddylot Bouncy Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6320 days Last view: 6284 days |
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| Teddylot: Sorry, Kirb. I only dig holes to China. Never to candy.
Teddylot stopped at the very edge of the island and bent over the edge while still managing to keep his balance. Teddylot took a stronger, two-hold grip of the bag full of stuff. He overturned the bag over the side of the island and out dropped a ton of letters similar to the ones Kirbynite was holding. The letters fluttered down slowly towards the earth below. Teddylot stood there, looking down at the fluttering paper that he had patiently printed, folded, and wax-stamped and smiled. Zap: *yelling from by the lake* Teddylot ... we're over the Pacific Ocean at the moment. Nothing's down there. Teddylot: Ah ... I see that now. Well, back to printing then. |
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Kirbynite Phan Phan I'm sick of being bogged down by homework!! Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6299 days Last view: 6285 days |
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| Kirbynite: That's what this whole trip was about?
Kirbynite looked over the side as well, also not losing his balance. Kirbynite: Hey, if you hope enough, maybe they'll get blown by the wind.. or that hurricane that seems to be forming below us. The Dreamlander blinked a bit. Kirbynite: Um... So... Who is "Dan Bakitus"? I mean, I'm curious now. What's up with the letters? |
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