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| Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - Officer's Club - Guilt Trips |
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Sinfjotle Lordly? No, not quite.                     Since: 11-17-05 From: Kansas Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| First thing to say, I'm not a bad kid, I haven't broken any serious laws, I don't really do all that much to even make a problem for anyone.
Now, sometimes, I just have horrible guilt trips, about nothing special, just some ordinary things. For example, I was in the movie theater, it was a bad day for me, lots of problems with people and me eventually just walking out, the United States Anthum song thing came on, and I barely noticed. I was just sitting near the back, and an old lady tells me to stand up and respect the flag. I didn't hear her, because frankly, I wasn't paying attention to anything. She said it again, sounding kind of mad and offended, and I stood up this time, but I felt bad. Yeah, it was an accident, I know, I've reminded myself, I was barely watching the screen or anything around me, but I felt bad. As if I did something horribly wrong, when I didn't do anything really. I thought about it through most of the movie, and obviously, I still am thinking about it from time-to-time. This has happened several hundred times, and a lot more recently, and I'm not sure why I have these horrible guilt trips over nothing bad. The worst part is, if I do something really wrong, something I could hate myself for, I hardly feel anything. In the end, I don't regret the action, I regret not regretting the action (if you can follow that). Its... maddening, and its getting worse lately. I'm not doing great in school, I'm not trying, but when I go and think about it, or come back and actually try, I still do just as well as if I hadn't been trying. I'm *almost* failing some of my classes now, whereas last year, I was passing all my classes by a huge margin. So, I end up feeling bad that I can't do better even though I want to, I feel bad that my parents expected more from me than that, and I can't ignore it either. Right now, I'm just venting, its supposed to help, but even as I'm typing this sentence right here, I'm wondering if I even should. Yeesh, my mind is fucking set on making me hate it. |
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Aurxix Flurry Since: 11-23-05 From: Canada Last post: 6742 days Last view: 6742 days |
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Well everybody has them I just try to do something that really makes me happy, or try to ease the pain at moments there is no real way of stoping it but there are ways to prevent it  |
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Sinfjotle Lordly? No, not quite. Since: 11-17-05 From: Kansas Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| Well man, its not that I have them, its that I have them constantly over little things that shouldn't warrant them.
Dude, I said fuck out loud in a school before, a teacher told me to watch my mouth, and I felt bad for the rest of the day. I've come to a point in mental thinking, that I *KNOW* there isn't such a thing as a bad word, and even the meanings of these words aren't bad, they have a hundred different uses. So, why did I feel bad? That's the problem, I can know I shouldn't feel bad, but I feel bad anyways. It's been taking a toll on my sleep lately too, which is hell. |
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Aurxix Flurry Since: 11-23-05 From: Canada Last post: 6742 days Last view: 6742 days |
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Well if your a young teen these things can happen alot I caint exactly explaine why but its alright and there is nothing to be ashamed about at all. 
Acmlm's Is Here for Ya  |
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Tarale    2710 Affected by 'Princess Bitch-Face Syndrome' ++++!! Persona non grata Since: 11-17-05 From: Adelaide, Australia Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| It's not normal to have these guilt trips. Depending on how bad they are, it might just be a phase you're going through, or it could be some kind of Anxiety thing.
I have Anxiety issues, and I usually just try to rationalise the issue, be it uncontrollable (and irrational) guilt or whatever and then go and distract myself with something else. Try doing some relaxing stuff too, it might just be that you're a touch stressed and stuff |
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Wurl Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6337 days Last view: 6337 days |
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| Since when does the national anthem play at movies? And who cares if you don't stand up? I face away for the pladge at school and only a couple teachers have given me crap. | |||
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Aurxix Flurry Since: 11-23-05 From: Canada Last post: 6742 days Last view: 6742 days |
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| Well I just hope everything works out for you and youll be alright |
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Sinfjotle Lordly? No, not quite. Since: 11-17-05 From: Kansas Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| I tried that Tarale, and I knew it would be a suggestion, but that only helps while I'm doing it, and if there is anytime for me to really think, I think about it. Also, sometimes I can't do some of the things I enjoy because its all I can think about.
Wurl: Augusta is an old town, with a VERY old movie theater, if I wasn't getting in for free, I wouldn't have went. Also, Harry Potter 4 would've been awesome if I'd never read the books. Aurxix... I know that, I'm not worrying about me eventually going insane and killing myself. I'm stronger than that. I'm also very prideful, and I didn't want to post this because of that pride. However, I have control over my pride, so its not a problem. I don't have a control over this, and its starting to effect me. |
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Tarale 2710 Affected by 'Princess Bitch-Face Syndrome' ++++!! Persona non grata Since: 11-17-05 From: Adelaide, Australia Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| Yeah, I kinda find that too, but honestly it's the best advice I have outside of suggesting you speak to a professional. If it's getting really bad, that might be your only option.
If you speak to your GP or anything, see what they say. Personally, I'd avoid being put on drugs, but that's your call not mine. They work for some people, so it's up to you. Personally, I'd be asking your GP about Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy. Your "guilt trips" are generally caused by what's called "cognitive distortions" which are negative ways of thinking. Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy is supposed to re-train your brain away from these negative ways of thinking. (And towards more rational positive thinking patterns YAY) Might be worth looking into  It's what I'd try... hell, it's what I might try if I keep on going with my own anxieties  (edited by Tarale on 11-27-05 09:42 PM) |
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Sinfjotle Lordly? No, not quite. Since: 11-17-05 From: Kansas Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| Now that's advice I can put to heart.
Assuming you can tell me what a GP is  .
And yeah, I'm... not a big fan of pills/drugs/mind altering medicine. I think I will look into Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy though, it sounds interesting to say the least... |
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Tarale 2710 Affected by 'Princess Bitch-Face Syndrome' ++++!! Persona non grata Since: 11-17-05 From: Adelaide, Australia Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6296 days |
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Originally posted by Dracoon GP -- General Practitioner. AKA "Family Doctor" or whatever. 
And yeah, Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy sounds interesting to me too. I have managed to identify a few of those "cognitive distortion" things in my thinking.... just for fun, see if you can think of any you have... they might be what's causing the guilt trips! 1. All-or-nothing thinking - thinking of things in absolute terms, like "always", "every" or "never". Few aspects of human behavior are so absolute. (See false dilemma). Course, buggered if I know how to FIX any of these... that's what the therapist is for |
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Hiryuu Sword Maiden Retired Admin  Since: 11-17-05 From: Nerima District - Tokyo, Japan Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6296 days |
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Originally posted by Dracoon Well, if you're in the second grade, you should be. If not, you should know that by now you're getting to being an adult in your life regardless. If a teacher told you to watch your mouth when you used the word 'fuck' in public I would wonder how far into the '00s he/she is. Anymore it's just common lingo more than a curse. Godforbid, though, that South Park ep with the ungodly amount of times the word 'shit' or similar was used comes true. That would suck. I'll say this much, I used to guilt trip myself far too often. I found that doesn't really help a lot. Sure it's great that you know how to kick your ass and stay in line in terms of society and being a good person and whatnot but overdo it and it doesn't do wonders for your self-esteem. Keep on telling yourself that you suck and you'll eventually believe it is what it comes down to. I usually just start caring less. I find this tends to be a good solution to a point but at the same time a lot of people that are over-worrying by nature have a hard time doing it just for the sheer fact that they feel they're acting even worse by not worrying enough and possibly being bad because of it. Oy, conundrum. So, basically, either worry like crazy like you have been about guilt trips that probably don't amount to much in your life regardless when you could live your life with less worries in your life or practically stop caring and be in the position to becoming an asshole. There's a fine line in there to walk where you can be on neither side. :\ |
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Cruel Justice I have better things to do. Since: 11-18-05 From: At my house! Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| You're not used to doing bad is why you feel horrible when you do the slightest, immoral thing. I cannot say it's bad at all to sense guilt but you shouldn't drag yourself to the point where you feel miserable. Can you change what has already passed? No. You made a little mistake and that's fine. Just worry about things you can solve, like your grades. You'll get something good, I'm sure. |
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Shane Red Cheep-cheep  Since: 11-18-05 From: IRELAND!!! Last post: 6307 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| That can happen to me sometimes too if I do the slightest thing wrong plus I can get really pissed off at the person who makes me feel that way. So I know how you feel. You just have to think really hard to yourself and say "Shit happens!" I'm serious, it works alot of the time for me. |
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