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| Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - Officer's Club - Time for an update! |
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Schweiz oder etwas [12:55] (Dr_Death16); I swear, the word drama needs to be stricken from the dictionary, for I've heard it so many times, it will permanently be imprinted on my brain                     Since: 11-17-05 From: Kingston, Rhode Island Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| Okay, so we've got a bunch of problems solved, and a bunch of new ones have risen.
Previously in my life, I was worried about getting 3000 dollars before September, among other things. This problem has been solved! I now have more work hours, and have been getting more money as a result. Imagine: I can actually meet my expenses. I'm also doing well in school, though I really want to do better, which I'll touch down upon below. Now, for the real problem: It's no secret by now, if you've been paying attention, that Dark Vampriel (currently known as Iori Yagami) and I want to meet up and see if we could possibly have some kind of relationship. That's good, right? I think it is. We share a lot of common interests, and I like talking to her a lot. There's just a few problems. Our primary source of communication is, of course, the internet. Now, I'm not always at home. I work, I go to class, and I hang out with my friends. The first two are far more prominent in my life. I also sleep. Sleep is very important to me right now. Since I've begun talking to her online, the amount of sleep I previously got dramatically decreased. It was okay for a while, because I was still talking to her and I was fairly happy. Then I started falling asleep in classes because I was going to bed at 5 AM and waking up at 9-10 AM to go to class. I can't live like that. I also can't bear the fact that I become a jackass when I'm tired, I get cranky and I hate the world. Get more sleep, you say? I would, but DV wants me to talk to her. I want to talk to her too, that's all fine and dandy, but what's the use of talking to someone if you're just gonna be a bitch to them 'cause you lack sleep? Couple that with the fact that my work life usually lands me home about an hour or two before I'd like to go to bed (around 11 or 12), and basically she's sad that I'm not spending enough time with her online. But at the same time if I don't sleep, I start failing classes. I can't do that! I have goals, and ambitions, and things that I want to accomplish. I have this need for competency and comprehension that encompasses nearly everything I do nowadays. But I don't want her to be sad. So what do I do? She's sad every time I end up leaving her online to go to sleep, she's sad whenever I come home late because I work at a job, and she's sad when I want to go to bed early 'cause I have a lab in the morning or a meeting or appointment. I don't wanna make her sad, but I want to have a life. I'm starting to realize that this is very much like it was last year. I really hope this isn't a repeat of last time. I've asked her what to do, and I told her to sleep on an answer, but somehow I get the feeling I won't really have much to work with when that happens. She keeps insisting that she can't change, which is fine, but I want to know if we have to cope, or if we have to stop. |
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Valcion Knuckle Joe too much high power man  Since: 11-17-05 Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| There's plenty of ways to cope. Just gotta find whatever way you can to talk to her and keep contact. E-mails are good.
Why should you have to give up love? In my opinion that can only help, but then again i'm a hopeless romantic and i believe in THE TRUE BURNING PASSION SPIRIT OF HOT BLOODED LOVE AND COURAGE. Or something like that. I'm sure you'll find a way to create balance though. |
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Danielle     6730 Administratorrrr HELLO THERE   Since: 11-17-05 From: California Rate me ^_^ Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| Yeah, what Val said about emails. That way you can still talk, but it would be whenever it's easier on you.
*snip snip aim convo snip snip* Just try your best to communicate how you feel. And everything else I said. |
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Vyper Kodondo Raging Venom  Since: 11-18-05 From: Final Fantasy Fire Last post: 6312 days Last view: 6312 days |
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| Now you know why long-distance relationships suck. | |||
mattp Red Paratroopa Since: 03-04-06 Last post: 6559 days Last view: 6559 days |
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| Don't let her control you. For all you know she could be off screwing other people when she's offline. | |||
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Schweiz oder etwas [12:55] (Dr_Death16); I swear, the word drama needs to be stricken from the dictionary, for I've heard it so many times, it will permanently be imprinted on my brain Since: 11-17-05 From: Kingston, Rhode Island Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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Originally posted by mattp That is very.... Unlikely. I'll just say that. |
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Cynthia Uh-huh. Since: 11-17-05 From: LaSalle, Quebec, Canada Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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Originally posted by mattp That's a hell of a thing to say about someone who's a board member, you know.  |
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mattp Red Paratroopa Since: 03-04-06 Last post: 6559 days Last view: 6559 days |
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| Why Colin? It's valid advice. This IS the internet after all, its very easy to fake a persona.
Would it be kosher to say the same thing were she not a board member? Either way, if she's a board member then why is Grey being so indirect about saying this to her? If I were her, I would be offended that he wouldn't just talk to me outright. |
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MathOnNapkins 1100  In SPC700 HELL Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| So what do I do? She's sad every time I end up leaving her online to go to sleep, she's sad whenever I come home late because I work at a job, and she's sad when I want to go to bed early 'cause I have a lab in the morning or a meeting or appointment. I don't wanna make her sad, but I want to have a life.
I don't want to talk badly about DV, but as I understand it she's had her problems in the past with online relationships, some of them very odd and not easily understood by most of us. It seems to me that she's chronically depressed. Look at how many times you wrote the word 'sad' in the quoted paragraph. That hit me immediately when I read it. Why is she staying up till 5am? Isn't a lack of sleep a sign of depression? I don't mean to suggest that she is the problem much, but it's worth considering. If she's not getting enough sleep, maybe she should. I sleep my deprive myself fairly often and when I do it's anything but fun. |
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mattp Red Paratroopa Since: 03-04-06 Last post: 6559 days Last view: 6559 days |
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| "Isn't a lack of sleep a sign of depression?"
Actually its a cause of depression. Not to be a smartass or anything but getting sleep is VERY important to mental health, especially for us young people |
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Arwon Bazu Since: 11-18-05 From: Randwick, Sydney, NSW, Australia Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6296 days |
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| And food too.
It sounds incredibly obvious, but I've lost count of the number of times that I've confused lack of sleep and food for a profound existential depression... |
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Deleted User Banned    Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6295 days |
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| If your relationship is sincere, she should have no problem with you going to bed, especially when you need to and should understand your time constraints. That said, you know my other opinions on this. |
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