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| 0 users currently in Craziness Domain. |
| Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - Craziness Domain - Consider this... |
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asdf Link's Awakening ಠ_ಠ                    Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| You are in the bathroom at somebody else's house, with feces spewing out your ass like never before. You finally get the last of them out and reach for the toilet paper...and you see that there is none. You decide that you have to use an alternative means to prevent...uhh...an ass clog. You have four choices. No matter what you choose, you would get away with it. They wouldn't have any idea that it was you, and would not believe you if you confessed to them.
- A Bible - A new magazine, unread as of yet. The subscriber really loves this magazine. - The front page of an old newspaper within a special-looking compartment. On it is news of the family's oldest son's greatest achievement, and it was a world-changing event. - Panties in the laundry basket, the only item in there...however, you know that the owner has many STDs. Those are the only four options you have. Now, this was a very big dump you took. Simply put, not wiping until you get home or using your own clothing is not an option. NOTE: This is really just a different version of the "Would you bring harm upon yourself in order to ensure others aren't harmed?" question. It's basically a question of morality, only with toilet humor involved.  |
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Deleted User Banned     Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6296 days |
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WALLPAPER! No... um... let's see. Well, if the panties were recently washed, then the panties. If they're dirty, it would depend on what diseases the owner has. But it is an STD so it can only be transmitted through sexual contact...  ... but still. I would probably use the Bible because I'm not that religious and they could just buy a new one!  |
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Koitenshin +∞ Moblin Since: 12-24-05 From: Misery Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6297 days |
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| The old newspaper, I just love ruining other people's days. | |||
MathOnNapkins  1100  In SPC700 HELL Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| The bible is the obvious answer b/c it has so many pages who would notice if a few were missing? Looks like we won't find out what happened to zebediah and roshana. Plus it's trendy to be sacriligeous. They also usually have soft paper, almost like tissues.
Other options: Panties - I don't usually even want to touch "clean" panties, let alone an STD infested one. THEY ARE UNDERWEAR. People don't usually leave their fancy lingerie out. If it was lingerie... well they don't call it ass floss for nothing. Magazine - Bad idea b/c I don't think glossy paper would be very effective due to a lack of absorbency and it wouldn't really adhere to the offending matter. Front Page of special newspaper - Newspaper would leave nasty ink stains on me buttocks, and while probably more effective than the magazine, still probably pretty poor choice. It's funny I was sort of thinking about this the other day. What would you do if you (are a guy) took a huge sloppy dump, then realize there's no toilet paper... then rummage under the sink only to find tampons and maxi pads. How adventurous do you think you'd be in that predicament? Personally, I find it advisable to carry a spare diaper at all times. |
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Koitenshin +∞ Moblin Since: 12-24-05 From: Misery Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6297 days |
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A diaper? I don't even wanna know MON, but yeah, am I the only guy who actually makes sure I keep my bathroom stocked with toilet paper? Or do I just plan so much ahead I am not human?  |
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182077607309.34 + Red Cheep-cheep  Since: 11-22-05 From: Atlantis. All your base are belong to us. Last post: 6327 days Last view: 6320 days |
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Originally posted by Koitenshin Originally posted by asdfYou planning ahead isn't going to help in this situation. As for me, I'd just yell out that there isn't any toilet paper and get them to bring it to me. (edited by 182077607309.34 on 01-01-06 09:34 AM) |
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Koitenshin +∞ Moblin Since: 12-24-05 From: Misery Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6297 days |
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| I was simply referring to what MON said. But yeah I would still use the newspaper. I mean it is an old newspaper, not fresh ink. And it'd hurt them more than if you used a bible. | |||
HyperHacker Star Mario Finally being paid to code in VB! If only I still enjoyed that. <_< Wii #7182 6487 4198 1828 Since: 11-18-05 From: Canada, w00t! My computer's specs, if anyone gives a damn. STOP TRUNCATING THIS >8^( Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6296 days |
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You could probably just rip out a useless page of the magazine, like an ad.  Though I'd most likely just climb in the tub and take a shower. And if it makes a mess there, and they complain, I'll just tell them to make sure there's paper next time.  (Besides, not like it'd be too hard to clean... it's a bathtub, after all. )
Barring that, I might just wipe on my underpants and throw them away. I had to do that once when I was out camping... I knew the stall had no paper, but I didn't have time to find one that did. |
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Rydain Sir Kibble Blaze Phoenix Runs with the Dragon Within  Since: 11-18-05 From: State College, PA Last post: 6300 days Last view: 6296 days |
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Originally posted by MathOnNapkinsI'm not a guy, but I don't see any sort of a conundrum here (unless the sanitary products belonged to a woman who would kick your ass for using them all up without replacing them ). Unused tampons and pads are just cotton or a similar material. They're perfectly clean. There is no blood or other bodily waste on them. I understand why used tampons and pads are considered to be icky (other people's blood is a biohazard, after all), but some people's disgust of the clean, unused products themselves baffles me. Are those same people grossed out by a fresh roll of TP because it will ultimately be used to wipe shit off someone else's ass?(edited by Rydain on 01-01-06 01:29 PM) |
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Teddylot Bouncy  Since: 11-17-05 From: *uploading new location* Last post: 6330 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| The magazine, personally. Just tear out a useless ad page and BOOM ... clean as a wistle and back off to the party.
I'd use the magazine even if it didn't have any loopholes. |
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Danielle   6730 Administratorrrr HELLO THERE   Since: 11-17-05 From: California Rate me ^_^ Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6295 days |
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Originally posted by Teddylot Yeah, that was what I was thinking too. I mean.. yeah. It's a $1.50 magazine that they can get anywhere if they wanted another copy. |
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MathOnNapkins 1100 In SPC700 HELL Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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Originally posted by Rydain It doesn't really have anything to do with being "grossed out". The point is I think most guys would be hesitant to use tampons/pads for anything at all, due to the fact that they are for females. So it's the macho reaction. I'm sure you're aware of how afraid some men are of the feminine products aisle. |
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Alastor Fearless Moderator Hero  Since: 11-17-05 From: An apartment by DigiPen, Redmond, Washington Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| I'd take some tissues out of my pocket and use them. | |||
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Kyoufu Kawa Intends to keep Rom Hacking in one piece until the end  Since: 11-18-05 From: Catgirl Central Station Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| I once read that Navy Seals carry tampons with them.
It helps with wounds. Makes sense. |
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Rydain Sir Kibble Blaze Phoenix Runs with the Dragon Within Since: 11-18-05 From: State College, PA Last post: 6300 days Last view: 6296 days |
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Originally posted by MathOnNapkinsOh...rainBOWS! </Cartman> I do know of that particular aisle fear. One of my friends once dated a guy who didn't want to be seen with her while she was buying sanitary products. And I have heard of guys who refuse to pick up tampons and pads. (Actually, I worked with one way back when, and the rest of us got on his case after he said that.) And more recently, some guy at work wanted to know why I had a box of pads in my office. (My response was a singsongy dumbed-down speech about how when girls grow up, things start happening to their body. My male office mate thought it was hilarious.)Originally posted by Rydain For the record, I can understand not wanting to buy tampons and pads out of worry that you'll get the wrong type. After all, there are about five bazillion choices, many of which vary in significant ways, and many women have specific preferences and won't be happy with something other than the usual product. I just figured that the OHNOES TAMPONS!!11! response was a gross-out issue and not a macho thing. |
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Deleted User Banned Since: 05-08-06 Last post: None Last view: 6296 days |
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Originally posted by asdf Does anyone read? The 4 options given to you are the only choices you have. Obviously some people didn't notice this. |
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asdf Link's Awakening ಠ_ಠ Since: 11-18-05 Last post: 6297 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| Yes, read. You don't have anything extra that you can use on you, nor is there anything else in the room that is useable. Only those four items. And keep in mind that the subscriber to the magazine *REALLY* loves it. Every bit of it, even the ads. They will notice that a page is missing and they will be crushed by the loss of it. (edited by asdf on 01-01-06 05:41 PM) |
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DarkSlaya 930 Gamma Ray  Since: 11-17-05 From: Montreal, Canada Last post: 6296 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| Seriously, I'd ask someone to go get some.
Else.... BIBLE FTW. |
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Alastor Fearless Moderator Hero Since: 11-17-05 From: An apartment by DigiPen, Redmond, Washington Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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Oh, I read it. However, this entire scenario is based on me doing something extremely out of character, and I just can't have that  |
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Cymoro Administrator Since: 11-17-05 From: Cymoro Gaming Last post: 6295 days Last view: 6295 days |
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| The bible or the magazine, because:
- They're easily replaceable - Don't contain diseases. - (Bible) If it's of cheap quality, is better for wiping, since it won't be glossy/semi-glossy. |
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| Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - Craziness Domain - Consider this... |
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