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Clockworkz
Posts: 886/984		 It seems you're staying busy in this thread.
Busier than a dyke in a hardware store.

I also use "I'd hit that like the fist of an angry god."
This thread is lamer than FDR's legs. (family guy)
John F. Kennedy needed a parade like he needed a hole in the head.

Snow Tomato
Posts: 752/798		 "No, I've never heard of that pokemon."

Think about it.
PSlugworth
Posts: 57/61		 My boss used to say things were "heavier than a dead minister."

Myself, I'd like to hear the origins of that one...
Arwon
Posts: 450/631		 The best analogies involve implicit anti-semitism.

Seriously.
cpubasic13
Posts: 908/1193		 Meh, don't use analogies much. Although I try to relate it to current events at times...

"You screw up math like Kerry screws up jokes."
HyperHacker
Posts: 3889/5072		 Heh, along those lines I also like "a few x short of a y" type insults. Though that's not really an analogy either...
Jilkon
Posts: 213/227		 'Not the sharpest tool in the shed' is a classic.. not sure if it's the same thing but we used a few like 'Agile like a safe' and 'He's so "fast" that when he moves he stands still'.
Tommathy
Posts: 303/339
Originally posted by Yoronosuku
Originally posted by Tommathy
What analogies do you all find particularly apt for describing the various situations that life throws at you?

For example, when something is god-awful, I rather like the description "(subject) is to (category) what Jeffrey Dahmer was to cuisine."

We used to say "(subject) is to (category) what Masahiro Nakai is to singing" .__.;; its a regiional thing, wouldn't expect anyone not from Japan to get it xD (just like I don't know who Jeffrey Dahmer was)


Jeffrey Dahmer @ Wikipedia
Jagori
Posts: 143/155		 I tend to use "____ like yesterday's soup" no matter what the subject of comparison is. I'll make them up on the spot too, but when I don't feel like actually thinking of a valid second half they get kind of weird: "I was going through matches like Bob Dylan on a ferris wheel"
Cruel Justice
Posts: 1540/1637		 -You're slower than molasses in January.
-This is harder than a preacher at a playground.
-That's hung like a tick-tack.
-I'm like King Midas in reverse; everything I touch turns to shit.
-I'm as serious as cancer.
-You'll fly like a rock.
-You're singing is like a whore's vagina, when you open your lips it stinks!
emcee
Posts: 640/867		 I like the "Not superlative in the container/group" statements for saying someone isn't too smart. I mean, you got your common ones like "Not the sharpest knife in the drawer", and "Not the brightest crayon in the box". But you can really use anything. "Not the shiniest car on the lot", "Not the fastest sled on the hill", "Not the biggest book on the shelf", "Not the most oil producing country in OPEC"...etc..
HyperHacker
Posts: 3865/5072		 This is about as fun as dentistry.

And although not an analogy, I find myself saying "what a load" fairly often.
Rydain
Posts: 567/633		 (So and so's) brain is like a pile of rocks next to a hamsterless wheel.
jeff
Posts: 132/213
Originally posted by Yoronosuku
Originally posted by Tommathy
What analogies do you all find particularly apt for describing the various situations that life throws at you?

For example, when something is god-awful, I rather like the description "(subject) is to (category) what Jeffrey Dahmer was to cuisine."

We used to say "(subject) is to (category) what Masahiro Nakai is to singing" .__.;; its a regiional thing, wouldn't expect anyone not from Japan to get it xD (just like I don't know who Jeffrey Dahmer was)

jeffrey dahmer was a pedophilic necrophilic cannibal. i only know because his name is the same as mine. the bastard tarnishese it.

on topic, the only one i ever use much is "that was gayer than 8 guys fucking 9 guys"
Tarale
Posts: 2386/2713		 I've been known to say that things "slip faster than a three legged cat on a frozen pond". I got a weird look for that one.

I come up with lots of weird metaphors and analogies for trying to explain things at work. I can't think of any good ones right now. There was one about RAM and kitchen benches but I forget exactly what I said now.
Yoronosuku
Posts: 962/1239
Originally posted by Tommathy
What analogies do you all find particularly apt for describing the various situations that life throws at you?

For example, when something is god-awful, I rather like the description "(subject) is to (category) what Jeffrey Dahmer was to cuisine."

We used to say "(subject) is to (category) what Masahiro Nakai is to singing" .__.;; its a regiional thing, wouldn't expect anyone not from Japan to get it xD (just like I don't know who Jeffrey Dahmer was)
Sinfjotle
Posts: 1548/1697		 I rock the analogies harder than Valcion rockin' the mechs?

Metaphors and analogies are a hit and run thing, you know, like a drive by shooting.

I'm on a roll like a hungy vegan.
Tanks
Posts: 332/596		 "When life gives me lemons, I make beef stu..."
Valcion
Posts: 533/585		 I'm happier than michael jackson in an elementary school.
You failed harder than the phillips CDI


i have more but i cant think of them
Guy Perfect
Posts: 404/451		 I heard one the other day that was used to express a level of distain. "What a pile of dirty laundry!"
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Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - General Chat - Analogies


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