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| 0 users currently in Femine's Corner. |
| User | Post |
| D3stiny_Sm4sher Posts: 157/226 |
I never said I was never going to date if I didn't know it was 'perfect.'
What I mean is that I'm not going to marry someone unless I actually LOVE them, and they love me. I've never been in a relationship yet, and I already understand just how valuable it is to have someone who truly loves you for who you are, because I've felt that way toward people who want nothing of it. |
| Yoronosuku Posts: 452/1239 |
My big sister is marrying her online sweetheart in a little over a month (they met some times between of course..), so...I do not want to say it works for everyone, because it does not and it is not something I ever want to do for me, but..in some cases it does work, I guess you can see. Its if you can handle it long enough to make it work for you that counts. |
| mattp Posts: 153/174 |
Consider my advice.
If you don't date anyone except your 'true love', then you won't be prepared to be in a erlationship with them and you will screw it up. If you get experience in relationships with less important people, you will be better able to appreciate and treat your true love right. |
| D3stiny_Sm4sher Posts: 155/226 |
While it's true that I only live once, I don't think it's intelligent (for me) to go and 'party it hard' and all that.
I will just have to keep waiting longer for true love, and I'm not going to settle for anything else. And I know true love exists because I've felt it toward others--I just need to find someone who will feel it toward me. |
| Snow Tomato Posts: 690/798 |
Having been with someone for a year online.. I'd say that overall.. it will not work out. Especially when you're young and you can't visit that person.. like generally at all. I'd hate to be pessimistic.. but unless you're really really sure about it, which it sounds like you're not.. then don't go for it. It's frustrating.. and requires a LOT of self control for both parties. It's a lonely lonely way to live your life... and I'm assuming you're young. Just for your own sake... put yourself out there and go party it up.. live life to the fullest.. party hard and love harder you only live once. |
| Skydude Posts: 2365/2607 |
Originally posted by Bella Sadly, a lot of people do fall into those categories. And then there are those of us who aren't that great at meeting people and try every reasonable outlet to try to do so. I think the thread creator may fall into that topic as well. |
| D3stiny_Sm4sher Posts: 154/226 |
Oh, it DOES work out sometimes.
I mean, when it works out well, the only difference is how you met. I've met some people in pretty odd circumstances. It's not how you meet, it's where it goes from there. |
| Bella Posts: 158/169 |
I tried online dating with a guy I never met before and it lasted for a year and a half without even meeting him. I don't know what the hell I was on, I think I was just at that age where I was lonely and things weren't going well all together so I talked to him and everything. I figured out that far into the "relationship" that it was BS and I wanted out because it took me that long to realize shit. It really was an emotional struggle and I will never do it again.
I met 2 guys I met online. One I still talk to but we only coo ass friends. The other one only wanted sex and then a relationship which was also bullshit and made no sense to me. The one that wanted sex lived in my town and I met him and he wasn't all that cute anyway..ha..ha..ha.. The current guy I'm talking to I actually met on Yahoo chat and he supposedly goes to my college but at night and I've been talking to him on the phone since like Febuary and still haven't met his dumbass. After this one, I vow not to ever go online to find a "man". If I don't meet his dumbass by Saturday then it's a straight up wrap, I'm done giving my number out online after this one. Even he gets pervy now and then but I tell him to check his ass on that because I ain't like that. Before he was saying "Oh, Im scared to meet you because I'm too much of a freak for you." He's real sweet when he don't be talking that shit. Finding People online to date or whatever either want sex or to fuck with your emotions, or money. Well from my experience On myspace is actually where my friend met her current boyfriend who she is still together with, suprisingly. |
| D3stiny_Sm4sher Posts: 148/226 |
Um...Well, that sucks.
But money has nothing to do with it. I'm not gonna be giving money to someone I've never even met. And I still really like this one girl who rejected me, but because she rejected me, now I'm getting a crush on someone else. GRR. |
| Googie Posts: 147/391 |
Originally posted by D3stiny_Sm4sher I know it's not, it's that too many people I chat with online tell me that I don't live in the big apple, I live in the insane state. xD I got rejected online before (when personals sites used to be free) females even told me some nasty things that used to hurt me, and the ones I did meet online were just looking for a sugar daddy. Here's one tale for me to tell, I was sending money to this chick through Western Union, she always used to ask for money near the weekend. She used to send me pics of her looking really sexy, I even saved enough money to go out to meet her in Virginia. When I told her I was on my way she stopped me from going over there telling me that I don't have to visit her. When I told my friend (she was my bootie call at the time) she told me that the girl I was dating online was taking me for a sucka (she used to give me these sad stories when it came to money, no food, can't pay the rent etc.) I wasn't diggin that. So when I cut her off from the money, she was leaving me nasty messages at my house, call and at my job. It took a while for her to stop (I used to send her $200 a week for 3 months) eventually she stopped harassing me. That's one of alotta reasons why I don't online date anymore. |
| D3stiny_Sm4sher Posts: 147/226 |
Um...if you're Catholic, you might want to stay away from my college.
I'm not that big into religious details, but I think that this place isn't so keen on Catholics. I'm going to a place called Houghton College, to answer your question. Anyway, it's so annoying, because the girls who have qualities I like are also too conservative to give me a chance, and the girls who might possibly give me a chance don't have qualities I particularly like.  |
| Silvershield Posts: 160/587 |
Originally posted by D3stiny_Sm4sherNot to get off topic, but a quick aside... That's my dream school! I'm in New York at a school with Catholic roots that tries to pass itself off as a currently Catholic-influenced institution, but I'm really disappointed in how little the student body reflects that ideal. I think, of the various people I know here, maybe three are virgins (using that as some indicator of conservative values). And only one of them is a girl.
Out of curiousity, where do you go? |
| D3stiny_Sm4sher Posts: 146/226 |
Even on the internet, eh? That's too bad.
Getting to know girls 1 on 1 isn't always the best approach, unless it's the one they're seeking with you. Anyway, you DO realize when I said New York, I meant the STATE, right? Not the city. The college I go to is a Christian Liberal Arts college, and, as expected, most of the girls here are so conservative that dating is pretty much a bad thing to them, and yet, they all want husbands before they leave. Don't ask me how that works. They somehow expect Mr. Perfect to fall into their lap and for everything to work out peachy keen, I guess. Life isn't like that most of the time. |
| kuja killer Posts: 77/104 |
Heh I've tried so many times to be friends with girls or ask girls out that I had known for awhile...but I always get rejected 
I've tried getting getting to know alot of girls 1 by 1 through Myspace.com that live in the same city/area as I ....but still always getting turned down |
| Ziff Posts: 1019/1800 |
Originally posted by D3stiny_Sm4sher If you can...Get a date there, you'll get a date anywhere. I love the girls of New York, New YOOOOOOORK! |
| D3stiny_Sm4sher Posts: 144/226 |
Um, I live in New York, thank you very much, and everyone's not insane here.
Believe me, I want to meet a girl and becomes friends with her and then move into dating much more than date someone online. But the truth of the matter is that that approach has NEVER worked, ever, and there's nothing I can do about it, because it's never ME, it's THEM. I don't know what girls I befriend don't like about me, they just don't like me. I mean, the girl I like right now... We both care about each other, we're both always trying to do what's best for the other and what will make the other happy, we'll do silly random things now and again that are nice for each other, and we even find each other good-looking. But...she doesn't like me, not even much as a friend, much less someone she could date. And her standards are so high (though I think this is more social immaturity) that she refuses to even give a boy a chance in a relationship unless she KNOWS she could get married to them. See, to me, dating is a means of getting to marriage, but to her, it's more like...marriage is a means to date someone. And that's just sort of silly, I think. People don't start dating because they know they'll get married. It doesn't work so well, becaus euntil they're in relationship, they DON'T know if it'll work. But no matter what I do or say or how loyal or how loving or what I'm willing to do... None of it matters at all if she simply doesn't like me and doesn't see the good in me that other people do. And that's just depressing, knowing that no matter WHAT qualities I have or what I'm willing to do, if the girl I'm willing to give it to isn't even willing to give it a chance, it's all worth shit. But that's how life is, I guess. I'm just sick of waiting. Everyone tells me "you'll know" when you find that "someone" and you should always take the opportunity, but each time, I feel even more strongly about it, more willing, more open-minded, more loving, and each time, it NEVER works out, I'm never even given a chance, and it goes ot crap. I feel like if I met someone online, maybe they'd get to know me for who I am, not how I can act in person--very shy and quiet. I don't know. I'm just damn sick of hoping and wishing and loving and being ready to jump off a cliff for someone, when they'd rather I NOT feel that way about them and they refuse to even picture the possibility. It makes me feel like there's something innately wrong with me--something so wrong, people can't even look past it to see good in me. It's a bit of a mess. |
| Googie Posts: 146/391 |
I used to do the online dating thing back between 2000 and late 2003. I went through alotta drama back then. The women I met were insane, but then again I live in New York where everyone is insane. Please stay away from online dating, it's not worth it. But then again that's my opinion. |
| Thoughtless Posts: 1425/2405 |
Originally posted by mattp That sure is... 
Really. |
| Skydude Posts: 2277/2607 |
I think it largely depends on the kind of online dating you do, ephy. If you do it as a way to meet people in your general area, then past the way of meeting people it is pretty much just like "normal" dating. If you live far away and don't meet the person until you've gotten to know that person better...it's certainly not exactly like a long-distance relationship where you dated the person for a while before it was long distance, but not completely unlike it either.
Particularly in this world in which we are increasingly connected via the internet, online dating isn't quite so far from other things as you make it out to be. That said, I consider it more of a backup plan of sorts than where you should spend most of your time/resources looking for a date, since it is better to meet people in a more "normal" setting. |
| Ziff Posts: 1018/1800 |
Sure, going to a party and taking advantage of drunk chicks is COOL!
Say, you know what else is an upstanding activity that is proper when compared to online dating? Giving girls rooftinis! |
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