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05-04-24 12:20 AM
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Acmlm's Board - I3 Archive - Femine's Corner - My Problem
  
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D3stiny_Sm4sher
Posts: 125/226
True friends don't worry about what the other thinks.
They both love each other and don't ponder what the other person thinks because they innately are considerate.
Sinfjotle
Posts: 782/1697
Originally posted by Skydude
I've constantly been too worried about what other people think of me. That's been one of the defining characteristics of who I am, unfortunately.

I've been told that to be really mature is to just not care what others think of you. While rather simplistic, there's certainly a grain of truth in that. Realize that you are your own person, and the people who can be your best friends are the people who will like you as who you are.


Dracoon, I think you misunderstand what I'm saying, in your rather rude response to it. Basically, the idea behind it is that some people simply aren't worth your time, and most of the people who would be total jackasses fall into that category. You shouldn't care what they think about you, to be sure. As for other people, it's not about hiding, it's about not changing yourself to try to make others like you. Now, that's not to say you shouldn't change yourself, because there are definitely self-improvements anyone can make. But you make them because it'll help you be better, rather than because it'll make other people like you better.


These are parts I won't agree with until the end of time.

Everyone is worth some amount of time to your life, because whenever they interact with you, no matter how small or how large, it will change your life in someway. Every second you spend with someone, it is worth it for both of you, it defines who you are. If you lack caring what people think about you, you will easily fall into a static way of life.

I never said you should take what everyone says to heart.

I never said that you should completely overhaul yourself based on what one person says.

I never said that anyones opinion really mattered or didn't matter.

I just said it was idiotic and moronic to not care what someone thinks about you. It should always be taken into consideration, because you will know to avoid that person or not to avoid that person. If you don't care, you're just letting yourself go where ever you want, not caring if you're talking to a friend or not. You need to care about what people think of you if you want to form relationships to any degree, enemy or best friend. Otherwise, you're just in a world with a bunch of strangers.
RedFlameZero
Posts: 116/276
Originally posted by [GGS
Cruel Justice]Perhaps a speech class could help boost your confidence in front of a large audience? It helped me.

I'd say the hardest speech to accomplish is an impromptu, but hopefully you won't have to do that.
^.^ thanks for the Advice Justice ... ill try to Find a Class and Thankyou to Everyone else for the Extremely helpful Advice
D3stiny_Sm4sher
Posts: 122/226
Yea, Tarale's advice is some I'd back up.

Lately, I've been so open-minded that my brain has fallen out.

You just can't be too open-minded, because then you never define yourself, and you can't be too narrow-minded, because then you never grow.
mattp
Posts: 77/174
That's not awful, that's perfect.
Skydude
Posts: 1276/2607
That reminds me of a really AWFUL ytmnd I saw:

Right here.

Awful, but funny.
mattp
Posts: 76/174
Just fucking do it

Best advice there is
Cruel Justice
Posts: 847/1637
Perhaps a speech class could help boost your confidence in front of a large audience? It helped me.

I'd say the hardest speech to accomplish is an impromptu, but hopefully you won't have to do that.
Tarale
Posts: 615/2713
I worry a lot about what other people think of me, but then this seems to come hand-in-hand with having an anxiety disorder, so meh.

However, I think it probably is a lot healthier if you can disregard a lot of what others think. It's important to be confident within yourself, not have your confidence bolstered by other people. Part of that will mean that you shouldn't worry too much about what other people say or think about you.

Some people's opinions -- as already stated -- also just aren't worth bothering with. If people are baselessly trying to bring you down, don't let them. It's not worth your time, it's not worth the hassle, or the worry. This more or less goes for anything that is wholly negative (ie, stressful situations where there is no sizable benefit to you, etc). If it's going to be more damaging to you in the long run, don't bother with it.

Of course, it's good to worry about what others think to a point -- common courtesy and consideration for others is important -- but don't do so at the cost of your own sanity, confidence or self-esteem.
mattp
Posts: 73/174
How does that saying go..

Those that are worth your time will like you for who you are?
Skydude
Posts: 1243/2607
Dracoon, I think you misunderstand what I'm saying, in your rather rude response to it. Basically, the idea behind it is that some people simply aren't worth your time, and most of the people who would be total jackasses fall into that category. You shouldn't care what they think about you, to be sure. As for other people, it's not about hiding, it's about not changing yourself to try to make others like you. Now, that's not to say you shouldn't change yourself, because there are definitely self-improvements anyone can make. But you make them because it'll help you be better, rather than because it'll make other people like you better.
Sinfjotle
Posts: 771/1697
If he's that much of a jackass, just laugh at the fucker when he makes fun of you. Just laugh when he says something incredibly stupid and then after you stop, say that you're sorry for laughing, but he's damn hilarious.

If he's making fun of you for no reason, it's worth laughing at because it just shows how insecure he is.

If you are in high school, it only gets more idiotic.
RedFlameZero
Posts: 115/276
hmmm ya got a point Dracoon ... Maybe i could Try that Trick ...and About the Jackasses in School if Someone Insults me i just sit there with a Straight Face and Think of a Responce ... Like the Idiots in my Gym Class ... i just Sit there with People Around me... then when i Clearly say something he says something Gay like "Oh whats that? did you just say your Gay?" ... and Coincidently hes the Shortest and the Most Picked on in my Class ... i mean Damn how Sad can you get ... i mean taking out your own Furstration on Someone else?? well i Guess thats Just The Best way to Get rid of Furstration ... to him Atleast
Sinfjotle
Posts: 770/1697
Not caring about what others think is idiotic and moronic. It isn't mature in any way and is just a way to hide yourself from other people.

All I can say is that some people don't like to be around a lot of people or they don't like having a lot of attention on them. Personally, I prefer to have no one around me at all.

Dealing with stage fright is an easy matter though. Just get up and do it, don't worry about the consequences of being bad, because it isn't the end of the world. People will understand if you mess up and you're just a kid or its your first time around. The only people that will make fun of you are jackasses, everyone else will try and help you out and tell you how you could do better. Sometimes it is even easier to focus on one person in the audience towards the back and look just a tad bit over their head.
RedFlameZero
Posts: 113/276
ya i know ... i mean Like infront of Groups of People who dont know me ... i mean if i was in a Room with a hundred Friends ill be a Total Wacko but infront of a Groupof 4 people who dont know me a ... Shy to say it Lightly hehehe
Skydude
Posts: 1230/2607
I've constantly been too worried about what other people think of me. That's been one of the defining characteristics of who I am, unfortunately.

I've been told that to be really mature is to just not care what others think of you. While rather simplistic, there's certainly a grain of truth in that. Realize that you are your own person, and the people who can be your best friends are the people who will like you as who you are.
RedFlameZero
Posts: 112/276
Well i Think to much of what People Think of me and that has Stopped me from Doing many things as well as giving me a Helluva case of Stage Fright ... and i was just Wondering if there were others like me and If so ... HELP ME!!!
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