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| 0 users currently in Femine's Corner. |
| User | Post |
| Thoughtless Posts: 282/2405 |
Really can't add much to the conversation since everyone already covered what I was going to say.
Personally, I really have no limit. I mean at the moment I can say five years, in both directions is good enough for me, but that is now. Who knows if in the future, when I am 20 I fall for someone who is 28 or such. Oh and to add my parents have a big age gap. Thirty years to be exact. (Well not exactly, different months and such) Dad is 78, mom is 48. (And in case anyone is wondering, they have been together for more than 20 years) In relation to this conversation. Last time I checked my cousin who is roughly 20/21 was involved with a girl who is 15/16. The age thing wasn't the problem. The fact that he got the girl pregnant is what makes the situation a whole lot funnier in a cruel way. |
| Keitaro Posts: 120/373 |
Especially since...you know, some kids can hit puberty as early as 11 or 12. And honestly,any kind of relationship at that age, physical or otherwise, is a bit...well, unecessary. I'm a bit of a hypocrite as my first "relationship" was when I was 11, but in retrospect, as well as taking into account the extreme brevity of it, I'd say it was hardly meaningful  |
| Tarale Posts: 357/2713 |
Originally posted by max That just sounds kinda wrong. Like the saying if there's grass on the pitch, then play ball. I think that the legal age of consent needs to be taken into consideration a bit too. If both parties are under the legal age of consent, it's less "wrong" than one party being over and the other being under -- statuatory rape. The thing with age differences is that there IS a possibility for one party to be taking advantage of the (usually younger) party. This is recognised with the age of consent laws and such. |
| Nebetsu Posts: 50/356 |
I'm 17 and she's 15. ^^ Only two years age difference, but it still manages to sound bad. |
| Trapster Posts: 1294/3604 |
Originally posted by Yoronosuku Well, this really depends on when you´re young and and when you´re old. #-5 years might sound much when you´re young but when you get older, the age difference doesn´t matter that much. My parents age difference is 7 years or something like that. But it also depends on how YOU feel about it. "If you can be responsible and it is not illegal, then great! Of course that dosn't mean I would want to do something like that..but who knows, they say love comes where you least expect it. That's why I don't think you can really put a number on love." That´s really true. I´d also like to comment ona thing grey said. "You know, Yoro, that's really sweet in a way. From what you've told me about your aunt, it sounds like she likes to live life as young as she possibly can... Maybe she doesn't need to find a guy her age to fall for, 'cause she's always gonna be young at heart." You are as young as you feel. Even if you´re like, 50 years old, you might feel like you´re 25-30. So age doesn´t matter that much in the very end. But the Celine Dion part that Danielle mentioned is a good point. I hope this helped you. 
I think that my limit is 3 years younger and 2 years older. Not 100% sure, though. |
| netscape Posts: 30/90 |
basically if they have to do thier homework before thier parents flip, or view grannie panties as normal panties, and you don't, then they're the wrong age for you. |
| thrasas Posts: 22/117 |
As long there is love the age doesn't matter |
| Deleted User Posts: 1/-7750 |
The most accurate formula is rnd(5,12) |
| max Posts: 95/214 |
As long as the girl has hit puberty she's fine for any age basically. |
| Arwon Posts: 63/631 |
DrJ beat me to it. |
| drjayphd Posts: 137/1170 |
I've found the anecdotal formula of ((your age)/2) + 7 = minimum to be pretty much applicable. Meaning for me, 19 and up only. Good thing my girlfriend's, ah, 27...  |
| Ziff Posts: 337/1800 |
I'm not going to lie to you Americans. As a Canadian we've all been told by our government that she is actually a robot. Her marriage was actually formulated so that people wouldn't be frightened by her always being around the engineer that is designed to keep her operating.
However, I think there is something called the "maturity gap". I've learned about this magical rift in the age-to-relationship graph through observing a number of my friends in relation to their girlfriends. It has become a point of knowledge that a lot of people at the ages 14, 15, 16 and 17 assume themselves to be mature and able to have a stable adult relationship. What these people need to understand that any lasting relationship you have at that age becomes highly tempered by the passing of time as you become more mature. Through my copious observations I've discovered that girls/guys that are 18 shouldn't date anyone more than 2 years younger than them. And really, people in the 17-18 age group should probably refrain from dating 20 year olds. There is a fundamental divide in their thinking, and as much as the younger partner thinks that they are mature and able to deal well with it all it simply isn't true. I've seen FAR too many examples of this. The most extreme of which involves a controlling younger girlfriend which has caused one of my friends to regress to the maturity of a 15 year old - complete with gothic make-up and snivelling emo whining! I may sound very cynical but I've yet to see a stable, wholesome and equal relationship between ANYONE with a large age gap in this age category. I've noticed however, that there is an incresing upper limit to dating ages. I've seen successful relationships with 4 year disparities at the age of 18 (16/17 successful relationships with 19 is rare, but I've seen it...however I've seen too many tragic relationships within this category to really warrent approval). I've seen 19 go up to around 24 or so. After that I feel that the relationships require more work at an adult level as both individuals, generally, become more sexually self-realized. As the ages increase so too can the age gap. I, personally, see no reason why a 30 year old should be shunned for dating a 20 year old, or something like that. If it is a normal relationship (no coercive tactics or abnormal control) then there is nothing wrong. Two consenting adults. Meh. I DO however think that the idea that age is nothing more than a social construct has been over played in recent years and that idea needs to be re-evaluated. During the TEENAGE years it is unfair to say that age is merely a social construct. Every teen thinks that they are 27 years old and already a successful business man capable of holding a family. They also forget that inside of them is a giant, bubbling cauldron of shifting chemicals called hormones that fucks you up. I feel that this over liberalization of sex among younger age groups has caused a skewed perception of everything to do with relationships. Moreover "mental age" is something that I've always had a problem with. I've always been told that I think like a 75 year old man, and have recently garnered the nickname "grandpa _last name here_" from most of my family. Yet I don't think that it would be appropriate for me to have a relationship with someone much older than myself, nor someone vastly younger than I am. Is it because I'm a fairly mentally mature individual that has had enough life experiences to be vastly jaded towards the world and is a deep well of useless facts and knowledge? No, it is not! It is because I realize that mental age requires a certain sort of personality component, as well as an experience component. I have a really unamicable personality - I'm too combative and too reclusive to hold a relationship with most people. In addition to that, I do not have a lot of experience. And I'm not talking about relationship/sexual experience. For a relationship to be successful both partners need to have a lot of life experiences so that they can set forward lessons learned from these experiences in order to work through problems that could face them. This lack of experience is the main faulting with large age difference relationships...a person with little experience is more suceptable to control at the hands of someone who is extremely dominating. Often times this is what occurs (no matter what people here want to think) when someone who is 17/18 thinks that having a relationship with a 14/15 year is acceptable. Societally it is, but it can be a very harmful thing - even inadvertantly and indirectly. Same thing for 16/17 year olds having relationships with people years their senior. |
| Schweiz oder etwas Posts: 335/2046 |
You know, Yoro, that's really sweet in a way. From what you've told me about your aunt, it sounds like she likes to live life as young as she possibly can... Maybe she doesn't need to find a guy her age to fall for, 'cause she's always gonna be young at heart.
Then again, she's really not that old at all. My grandfather's like 80, and he's married to someone in her early fifties. Go figure. I don't really know what my age limit is, as I've never actually had an opportunity to test it. I think, as our good friend Kutske will probably eventually interject into the conversation at some point, that mental age is every bit as important, if not moreso, than physical age. Thus, for all we know I might be happier with a 14 year old that thinks like she's 20 than an 18 year old who acts like she's 9. Bleh, but I'm just a big kid inside, myself... |
| Yoronosuku Posts: 121/1239 |
I do think that the range can differ depending on how old you are, but at the same time, things can often work differently than you expect. I'm going to be honest..I said my auntie is 13 years older than her boyfriend. But, she just turned 30, that means he's 18. I guess when I think about it, it is actualy a little bit weird, but they seem to actualy care about one another a whole lot! That's why I never noticed so much.
She told me that it didn't feel wrong to her, she knew she'd never find someone like him if she let him go just so she could find an older guy. Really, this is what it's all about, right? I think that's what should matter, anyways. If you can be responsible and it is not illegal, then great! Of course that dosn't mean I would want to do something like that..but who knows, they say love comes where you least expect it. That's why I don't think you can really put a number on love. |
| Jomb Posts: 24/448 |
Hey, maybe it should go by percentage of your age instead of an absolute number. Maybe somebody could come up with a formula  |
| Shadic Posts: 54/528 |
I'm dating somebody that is my own age, which I think is the best, overall.
I find 2 years to be the most difference you really want before you're 18.. I find Freshman going out with Seniors to generally be more of a sexual fling, the girls want the guy for his car, and the guy wants to have his way with the girl. After hitting 18, things widen. 3 years is more acceptable, and 5 years difference once you're 21 isn't that big of a thing. However, I do find 10 years to be a bit weird, but once you're like, upper 20's and 30's, it doesn't seem to be that huge. |
| Tarale Posts: 296/2713 |
It depends on your age a bit.
I know older couples who have ten years difference and that's fine. But if it were a 14 year old with a 24 year old....that's not cool at all! 
Other than that, I don't think it really matters. |
| Jomb Posts: 21/448 |
I've always felt up to 10 years is ok, after that i'd be too worried about one of us dying off way before the other. Of course a ten year age difference can cause problems if it goes up against age of consent laws |
| firemaker Posts: 60/194 |
Personally I think that it depends on your age. up to about 18 years of age you hould really stick to people 2 years either way of you but then afterwards as you get old the gap starts to widen and then doesn't really hold any importance. |
| Anya Posts: 242/1176 |
Age is just a number and a state of mind, really. I mean, just as Danielle stated, it really comes down to common sense.
My soon-to-be-hubby and I are three years apart, save for three weeks when we are two years apart. When we met, I was 18 and he was 21. Now I'm 26 and he's 28. |
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