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Rat Brain Chauffeur: This one would be especially awesome, since I wouldn't have to make small talk with it and wouldn't have to pay it--I mean, what does a brain in a dish WANT, really? It's not like a brain in a jar, where it used to be a Nazi and either wants a body again or wants to take over the world. Maybe I could pour some stimulants into its container or something.

But the rat brain chauffeur would also be awesome not just for the laziness factor, but for the "wtf" factor I'd get from onlookers. I mean, what if it got a speeding ticket? Can you just imagine the following scenario?

OFFICER: (walking slowly toward passenger side window) Sir, do you know exactly how fast you were--
(sees brain in a dish turn toward him)
OFFICER: WHAT THE !#%& IS THAT?!

That'd be the cost of research right there.

Rat Brain Spam x: Since it seems like all I do when I open my inbox these days is delete about 200 pieces of spam and see maybe one or two real e-mails, I might as well let the rat brain do the deleting for me. I mean, the error rate wouldn't be THAT high, even if it just deleted everything. Sure, the pattern recognition on rat brain dishes is horrid so far, but I would never fear about the rat brain wanting to enlarge its non-existent penis or chest. So at least those wouldn't get through.

Rat Brain Video Game Player: The way I see this one is, I could just loose the rat brain on the FPS world in general. If it can fly a flight simulator, it can play Counterstrike -- some of the levels feel like navigating a rat maze anyway, and it would never complain about aimbots or anything like that. Its rudimentary brain would only be capable of l33t speak like "pwnz3d" or something anyway.

It'd at least be better than I am at CS (note that I'm the kind of gamer who gets motion sick from playing FPS games, thus why I don't write about them much).

Rat Brain Forum Moderator: Wait, we're employing a rat brain to moderate our forums already, never mind, on to the next one.

Rat Brain Fantasy Football Manager: Given some of the boneheaded moves I've made in Fantasy Football in the past (Why, WHY did I drop you, Ryan Longwell? For MORTEN ANDERSEN! Who's, like, 70!), replacing me with a rat brain wouldn't be all that bad. Maybe it'd be smart enough not to waste a fourth-round pick on that bum Aaron Brooks, and grabbed Javon Walker on the wheel or something. Not that I can complain that much.

Rat Brain Marching Band Member: Hey, it'd know more songs than the USC band (rimshot).

Rat Brain Pet: Related to the Chauffeur and Game Player ideas above, why not keep the rat brain in a dish as a pet? It wouldn't eat much beyond what's probably a protein-rich solution in its container, and unlike playing with more normal pets like dogs or something, it could play ESPN NFL Football with me and not slobber everywhere.

Yeah, I think I've thought way too much about what to do with my very own rat brain in a dish. But isn't it pretty to think so?

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Originally posted by Kitten Yiffer

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And honestly, I wonder if that rat brain even thinks. It sure dosen't feel hunger or anything but...

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Originally posted by windwaker

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It's a government conspiracy... ultra obedient rat brains in every computer.

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