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| Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - Lost Section - You're a bad influence... |
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Apple Kodondo Level: 38 Posts: 116/594 EXP: 350163 For next: 20284 Since: 03-27-04 From: Washington. Since last post: 264 days Last activity: 152 days |
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| This really upsets me... I known this girl since the beginning of last school year, and before anyone asks, no I do not like her any more than friends. So we talk a lot in school and after school, while I wait with her to get picked up (I ALWAYS wait until all the girls leave before I start walking home). Anyways, a month or two ago, her sister told her mom that, since I had long hair and facial hair, I was a drug addict. That alone was enough to piss me off but I have better things to do that take pointless and stereotypical opinions to heart. She tells me this and I laughed and she asked me if I was on drugs and I told her "I am not a drug addict" and that was that, because frankly smoking pot on holidays and birthdays with your family doesn't count as being an addict in my opinion. She has her mom meet me... Her mom |
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Dracoon Zelda The temp ban/forum ban bypasser! Level: 84  Posts: 836/3727 EXP: 5514391 For next: 147561 Since: 03-25-04 From: At home Since last post: 5 hours Last activity: 5 hours |
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| Sure it does just nothing important. It is like this quote from somewhere (probably simpson) "I have a conffesion to make, I do pot and crack..." "You smoke pot?!" "And crack." "Meh." Some people are just crazy. I would say try to explain yourself, but I am not sure that will happen. I hope your whole friendship doesn't end because of this and how would your eyes be preety? |
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DarkSlaya POOOOOOOOOOOORN! Level: 88 Posts: 438/4249 EXP: 6409254 For next: 241410 Since: 05-16-04 From: Montreal, Quebec, Canada Since last post: 8 hours Last activity: 5 hours |
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| People judging other people from what they look like should really be shot. But like Darcoon said, explaining yourself may be the best thing to do. It's not because you smoke pot once in a while that your a bad influence. I mean, you're not anybody to try to do drugs so I think you're not a bad influence. You seem like being a good one. | |||
Cruel Justice XD Level: 55  Posts: 96/1384 EXP: 1253266 For next: 60923 Since: 03-20-04 From: Darkwoods Penetentiary Since last post: 11 hours Last activity: 7 hours |
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| I know people who are much much worse than you. Don't worry, just wait. Things WILL eventually come around. You're grades for example; what are they gonna do about it? Spill the beans on ya and say,"OMFG! It's the crack addict! Hurry up! Put that on his permanent record!". If they have'nt done that, your not doomed forever; it might take some time, just stay cool about it. When people mention your little habit don't talk about it. Blot and blend the words and talk about something else. Once you apply for a nice career, they can look at your transcript and say, "Hey! This kid's pretty good! Look at those grades! You got yourself a new job kid!". As for social issues, ignore people and take all the hits; it's the most moral thing to do. They will gradually pay less attention to the pot-smoking incident. If they physically hit you or try to egg you on, don't run, take the beating. Violence only worsens your reputation amongst authority figures. I am sure someone will come out there and help right away. (edited by The_Raven on 07-08-04 01:27 PM) |
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Sister Micro-Goomba Level: 8 Posts: 12/17 EXP: 1545 For next: 642 Since: 07-04-04 From: Sweden Since last post: 459 days Last activity: 269 days |
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| of course its not a good think to do drugs, but as you say, your not an addict so that's ok.. and you seem to be a very nice persone and i can't find anything in what you write that can be a bad influence. But if she dosen't trust your word, then maybe you should just wait awhile and see if she after awhile gets her scences right and sees that your a good persone. And I think you have to make it really clear that you respect people that don't smoke pot and that you just do it 4 times a year, which also means that you actully can stop anytime... | |||
Bella Ludwig Von Koopa You're Gonna Love Me Level: 76  Posts: 592/2962 EXP: 3891483 For next: 114577 Since: 03-29-04 From: Groovy Way Since last post: 8 min. Last activity: 6 min. |
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| You're completely opposite from a drug addict. Just because you do it 4 times a year or anything doesn't make you a completely bad person but she might have been raised differently to think of people who do drugs. She might have been taught that people who just smoke once is an addict and a complete pothead. That the people who do it can't have their head on their shoulders. It seems like you do and keep everything balanced. Just because she doesn't believe you, don't let it get to you . It's just her and what she has been taught through her mother. Do what you do and she'll sooner or later realize what she said. | |||
HighSorceressDelial Buzzy Beetle DDR FREAK Slayer of Beasts Savior of Worlds Eater of Napkins Level: 31  Posts: 207/380 EXP: 181041 For next: 4322 Since: 03-15-04 From: Shimmering Waters Of Avden Since last post: 9 days Last activity: 2 days |
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| Well, I can see why she'd be upset that you didn't tell her. You didn't lie to her, you just didn't make things clear though. However, that doesn't make up for them just being stupid about this in general. They seem to find it easy to say your a bad influence, but they back it up with no proof at all. The next time they say that, ask them what exactly you have done to influence her badly. If they say it's because you're a drug addict ask them what affect it's had on her. You also may want to consider just putting your post in your livejournal for her to read. ~Delial |
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kornfan There's a BARB in my EYE! No reregistering, Mr. Permabanned! Level: 38  Posts: 120/622 EXP: 344540 For next: 25907 Since: 06-27-04 From: the middle of fu**ing nowhere... Since last post: 414 days Last activity: 297 days |
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| I agree with HighSorseressDelial about putting this exact post in your live journal. I know that you must feel totally bad about being judged by th e way that you look. Even at the church that I go to, the people that I know's parents don't like me because I "look like I'd be a bad influence". Even though thath I'm like totally on fire for God. Judging people by looks alone without even saying a word to them is just so freacking wrong. (edited by HighSorceressDelial on 07-08-04 09:32 PM) |
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Sofie Level: 52 Posts: 545/1210 EXP: 1028812 For next: 55028 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 187 days Last activity: 279 days |
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| Sofie thinks you're sweet and caring. And you can't even call yourself a drug user if you do it out of something that seems like a tradition, it more seems like the obligatory sigar new dads have to smoke  She'll come around, Apple. Just wait and see. |
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kornfan There's a BARB in my EYE! No reregistering, Mr. Permabanned! Level: 38 Posts: 174/622 EXP: 344540 For next: 25907 Since: 06-27-04 From: the middle of fu**ing nowhere... Since last post: 414 days Last activity: 297 days |
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| Agreed. If you go and get drunk on new years eve, does that make you an alcoholic. By definition an addict means that your body has some kind of unnatural want for whatever you're 'addicted' to. | |||
Subliminal Cukeman Permaban - Flaming staff, homophobia Level: 28  Posts: 3/322 EXP: 126544 For next: 4794 Since: 07-10-04 From: My House (Imagine That) Since last post: 407 days Last activity: 298 days |
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| Personally, I think you should just drop everything, no more smoking, not even on special occasions. That way nobody can use that against you, and just explain yourself, hell, even call up the mom and tell her that you're a good person. If your not up for that, then just talk to your friend, and as said above, explain yourself. | |||
Kahunah Paratroopa Level: 20  Posts: 28/155 EXP: 42288 For next: 151 Since: 07-10-04 From: Whitby, ON, Canada Since last post: 441 days Last activity: 339 days |
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| hey Apple i smoke pot and drink regularly and fuck what people say about you man. people have told me that i'm a pot head, some people say that i'm an alcoholic and whatever man don't take anything to heart. yes i smoke pot maybe a couple times a week or so and drink every other weekend, but that's never left a blemish on my integraty nor my character. like you i am sympathetic to those less fortunate, i offer a hand with whoever whenever i can, i'm an average student nothing special, and i'm just not a dick to people. i'm involved in a band and a big brother-ish program, sports like soccer and snowboarding and i hold down two jobs while going to school. people can talk a lot of shit about you man, but unless you proove them right and you are without direction, doing criminal activities (i don't consider smoking pot a criminal activity, who are you hurting...yourself? you should be able to determine your own path, no one should govern you or your actions but yourself.) and things along those lines then yes you aren't contributing to society and would probably be a bad influence. the trick is to be yourself and to be happy and proud of you you are. if other people can't accept you for who you are, its unfortunate but thats the way it is. there is no reason why you should change your ways to suit other people. then you could look at it like anyone else is selfish forcing you to change your being and abusing you/taking advantge of your good nature. if your friend is unhappy with you so be it. if she can't lose her ignorance for something like pot (which natives north american indians were doing when europeans first came to the Americas...and by the way does that make all natives who were avid partakers of the peace pipe ceremony bad people who you shouldn't be influenced by though they had all the respect in the world for all aspects of life?) then that's her shortcoming man. Most of your parents smoked pot back in the heyday of the 60s and 70s and does that mean we've been wrong to look to them for support and guidance and influence while we grew up? no man its all bullshit. tell your friend you are sorry she feels that way and that she needs to learn to accept you for who you really are and to see you for all the good things that you've done, not for one little thing that society wrongly deems as negative. |
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Prier Archangel Administrative Priestess. NUCLEAR SUB WEEEOOOO Level: 119  Posts: 2086/8392 EXP: 18790939 For next: 138352 Since: 03-15-04 From: Nerima Dist. - Tokyo, Japan Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 1 day |
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| Pff...everyone's a bad influence on everyone. You know why? No one's perfect. Simple answer to all of this, they know jack shit. I think there's...quite a few people here that could vouch for your character if ever given the opportunity. So if there's a negative about stuff that you have going in real life, you've got that much then. Plus...high school sucks. You're probably one of the more caring people...but even so that probably doesn't mean a lot at the moment if people are stupidly out to seeing how much dirt they can find on anyone. Easy to break someone down, hard to build someone up; use a wrecking ball liberally. That would be high school in my terms. As long as they're on this tirade...I doubt very seriously there's a lot you can do about it...even if you somehow found proof that was somehow decent in your case...reason is, then they'd hate having to be wrong, etc. etc. and the whole impression thing still lingers on even afterwards. 'Hey remember when I thought you were a dumbshit drug addict? Yea...that was SOOOO FUNNY!' Yea...obviously there's no hope for that...but you can't get down over stuff like this. Yea...there's going to be the occasional fucknut like this along the road...but in the long run you'll have to figure out what works and what doesn't for yourself in this. Impressions by rumours are probably not really good ones. If they ever figure out what you really are by their own observations and not by other people's words that might be bullshit...then they might have a legitimate say in their accusations. I think you're just fine...it's just rumours kill impressions. My high school career is proof of that. >>> Offshoot: 'Oh, and she said my eyes belonged on a girl.' I got that with a friend's mother about myself...or something very close to that. I was like...okay? So see...you0're fine...it's just they're nutcases. (edited by Ranko on 07-11-04 04:38 PM) |
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kornfan There's a BARB in my EYE! No reregistering, Mr. Permabanned! Level: 38 Posts: 216/622 EXP: 344540 For next: 25907 Since: 06-27-04 From: the middle of fu**ing nowhere... Since last post: 414 days Last activity: 297 days |
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Originally posted by Ranko Hey apple. Based on what I read in just that first post, I'd vouch for your character if the need arose. |
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Kahunah Paratroopa Level: 20 Posts: 32/155 EXP: 42288 For next: 151 Since: 07-10-04 From: Whitby, ON, Canada Since last post: 441 days Last activity: 339 days |
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| I would too man, like Ranko said, most people just want to beak you down because it makes them feel better about themselves and when you are going through highschool EVERYONE has security issues with themselves. | |||
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kornfan There's a BARB in my EYE! No reregistering, Mr. Permabanned! Level: 38 Posts: 253/622 EXP: 344540 For next: 25907 Since: 06-27-04 From: the middle of fu**ing nowhere... Since last post: 414 days Last activity: 297 days |
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| Yeah. But at least you've got us here to give you advice. I could say that noone else's opinion matters. True as it may be, you still need friends. Tell the girl the whole story, and wait and see how she reacts. That's about all that I can think of for you to do. | |||
alte Hexe Star Mario I dreamed I saw Joe Hill last night Alive as you and me "But Joe you're ten years dead!" "I never died" said he "I never died!" said he Level: 99  Posts: 854/5458 EXP: 9854489 For next: 145511 Since: 03-15-04 From: ... Since last post: 2 hours Last activity: 2 hours |
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| That is stupid. I do drugs quite a bit nowadays (just pot, I quit out on anything too much harsher), yet I've become more responsible. I keep my room tidy. I do my summer school work. I walk the dogs. I do house work. I never get in trouble with people. So, in this way, is my own conscience doing of drugs make me a bad person? I don't force them on anyone, and I don't do what most other "druggies" do. I hang around the local cannabis culture shops, tattoo parlours, etc. Does this make me a bad influence? Nope, I tell people that they alone make the decision to take a toke off a j-doobie. And if they don't want to deal with the consequences, then don't do it. I learned what those were the hard way. Also, I warn people against tattoos and piercings (I'm getting a tattoo on my ass next week) because they are PERMANENT. Remember, just because someone has "bad" habits, it doesn't make them a bad person. Tell that to that crazy old cunny. |
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Prier Archangel Administrative Priestess. NUCLEAR SUB WEEEOOOO Level: 119 Posts: 2123/8392 EXP: 18790939 For next: 138352 Since: 03-15-04 From: Nerima Dist. - Tokyo, Japan Since last post: 1 day Last activity: 1 day |
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Originally posted by kornfan I'm pretty sure he's done that. If it's anything like I'm thinking, do you really think it'll help much if she thinks the rumour is true...like I said...it'll be hell convincing...and even if you did...they won't like admitting that they're wrong...especially about something this extreme. |
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kornfan There's a BARB in my EYE! No reregistering, Mr. Permabanned! Level: 38 Posts: 285/622 EXP: 344540 For next: 25907 Since: 06-27-04 From: the middle of fu**ing nowhere... Since last post: 414 days Last activity: 297 days |
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| Than what can he possibly do? Even if he shows that he's not an addict, it won't help? Maybe if he somehow admitting that he was wrong(even though he's not) then maybe their friendship won't be torn. | |||
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Apple Kodondo Level: 38 Posts: 144/594 EXP: 350163 For next: 20284 Since: 03-27-04 From: Washington. Since last post: 264 days Last activity: 152 days |
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| Shes not bad at me. Hasn't been for a day or two. I knew she wouldn't be for long since out of her three friends, I'm the closest thing she has to a best friend (The latter was her exact words), which probably explains why she got so upset and mad at me for it. Shes still not 100% happy with me but I'm sure she will be at that point soon  Originally posted by Bella Yeah, she was raised on the whole "drugs are bad, everyone who does them is bad" thing. The comedical thing is that I been around enough drug addicts, as well as read up on the majority of drugs outthere several times, to be able to spot a drug addict. Make it short, her mom shows alot of signs. Originally posted by Bella I'm frankly tired of her mother. Her mother has her so bent out of shape that she doesn't even live in the real world. Instead she lives in this make believe world that EVERYONE is out to get you, than you have to lock every window and door even if you're home with company. Hell... For the first few months of the school year, she didn't talk to any guys since "they are all rapists". School was from noon to 330. Her mom dropped her off at noon on the dot, never earlier and was there before 330 everyday. Its unbelievable. She doesn't leave the house, before it was because "theres too many bad people outthere" (her words) but now its because her mom wont let her. When I walked her mom from school, she got majorly bitched at from her mother (and which started this whole mom hating me thing) and her brother also got bitched at for allowing me to walk her mom (Her brother was supopse to drive her mom but she told him that she would rather walk with me). Its pathetic. Originally posted by HighSorceressDelial I believe that is what upset the most. Originally posted by Sofie Originally posted by Sofie I know, Thats what I said to her over AIM about this. It didn't really help much though. Originally posted by Subliminal I agree with you on that. I told my sister that I was gonna stop doing it on the fourth. I made a topic in my journal about how I should stop using drugs on holidays because my cousin's idolize me. Thats how she found out and which started this whole thing. Originally posted by Subliminal I kind of want to because I want to be in the nod in the eyes of parents and other family members of my friends. However, I don't see the point, I'm just not going to deal with it, she'll come around sooner or later. If she doesn't, its not my lost really. Originally posted by Kahunah I AM DAMN PROUD of who I am. There are very little things I would change about myself (More Self Displine, More Charisma, and more helpful) Originally posted by Ranko That, my friend, is why I always ask for your opinion. Originally posted by Ranko The thing is... I don't want people to vouch for my character. I don't want the need for it to ever arise. I base my opinions of people on what I see from them, not of what I heard from someone else. I just wish everyone would view each other in the same way. Let people be hateful, as long as its not someone else's hate. Originally posted by Ranko Ok, first of all. I got to to an Alternive school, the Indepentent Study program to be exact. The people I have meet in this program have been the most real people I have meet so far through out my schooling (besides for one or two). No one puts you down, no one offers neagitivity. Its all constructive critism. A little off the subject of what I quoted but I wanted to state that. Originally posted by Ranko Just agreeing with you on what you said. Originally posted by Ranko Yeah, I didn't know how to respond to such a statement. I tried to reply to most of everyone who replied in this threat but since I didn't feel like repeating what I already said before, I left you out. Sorry. |
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