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| Acmlm's Board - I2 Archive - Lost Section - Just wants to be friends clause |
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Dark Vampriel Lynel "Life is just a dream on the way to death." Level: 57  Posts: 1009/1658 EXP: 1400355 For next: 85573 Since: 08-29-04 From: Somewhere..... Since last post: 2 hours Last activity: 4 min. |
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I can't take it anymore!!!!! Every guy I go out with just ends up being back where we started as friends. I'm so broken hearted right now and feel dead empty inside because my bf just wants to be friends now.  I still love him deeply but he doesn't mean it like that anymore. I can't change his mind but I still care more than just friends for him. He's the only guy I have ever said "I love you" to. After looking back on the past on talking about him to a friend and her asking if I liked him. I realized after denying it that I did then I accepted it and that's when I told him I liked him. Then after trying to meet him while he was Chicago last summer I totally fell in love with him once it didn't work out meeting him there. Of course we had our ups and downs but we managed to pull through. I can't imagine another guy taking his place that I will love like that. Given a second chance I will do the samething I did before to meet him in Chicago when he's there again. I just hope there will be something for us in the future that we can date again. Right now I hope I can handle just being friends with him for now without making him crazy with the love I still have for him.Why can't someone not just wants to be friends with me? And has this happen to any of you with what I like to call the 'just wants to be friends' clause? |
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MathOnNapkins Math n' Hacks Level: 67  Posts: 1462/2189 EXP: 2495887 For next: 96985 Since: 03-18-04 From: Base Tourian Since last post: 1 hour Last activity: 32 min. |
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| Damn, I feel bad for you. I recently broke up with my girlfriend and we didn't really say the "let's be just friends" clause but it was sort of implied. I suppose it's different for you since it's a long distance relationship, but it's still gotta be really upsetting. You have to understand that if he's a decent guy, and I'm sure he is, it's hard say no to somebody who loves you. It's hard to break up with that person b/c you know it will crush them. But it's for the best in the end b/c without both people being 100% engaged in the relationship you would just start to hurt more and more. And the hurt is on both sides. I mean, don't take this as discouragement, but don't hold your breath on this person and expect that he will want to get back with you in the future. It's possible, but you shouldn't consider it as an eventuality. Just hang out with your friends around town and try to cheer up in the short run. |
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knuck Hinox Banned until 19-58-5815: trolling, flaming, spamming, being a general fucktard... Level: 62 Posts: 1189/1818 EXP: 1894574 For next: 90112 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 14 hours Last activity: 9 hours |
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Long distance relationships only work 1% of the time, so it's not worth.  About your boyfriend, since he was the one that said "let's just be friends", it means that he doesn't want to get back with you, so there is no point in keep thinking about him. You will get over it eventually. Trust me. (edited by knuck on 02-23-05 10:53 AM) |
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Dark Vampriel Lynel "Life is just a dream on the way to death." Level: 57 Posts: 1010/1658 EXP: 1400355 For next: 85573 Since: 08-29-04 From: Somewhere..... Since last post: 2 hours Last activity: 4 min. |
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| MathOnNapkins I did hang out with a couple of friends today and going to be doing that tomorrow as well. I'm still pretty sad right now and haven't gotten much sleep last night. I love him too damn much to just forget about him. Even though I did hang out with my friends I still couldn't be happy. |
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Kario In Possession of a Stolen Shovel Level: 65 Posts: 1287/2082 EXP: 2321379 For next: 14249 Since: 03-15-04 From: Texas... Yeehaw! Since last post: 2 days Last activity: 17 hours |
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| How old are you? | |||
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Dark Vampriel Lynel "Life is just a dream on the way to death." Level: 57 Posts: 1011/1658 EXP: 1400355 For next: 85573 Since: 08-29-04 From: Somewhere..... Since last post: 2 hours Last activity: 4 min. |
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| I'm 18, why? | |||
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MathOnNapkins Math n' Hacks Level: 67 Posts: 1480/2189 EXP: 2495887 For next: 96985 Since: 03-18-04 From: Base Tourian Since last post: 1 hour Last activity: 32 min. |
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| Kario's looking for a date maybe? thread.php?id=10060 ok, so maybe it's a bad joke, sorry. Actually I've been pretty miserable too. Given that most of my best friends are also friends with my [edit: EX]gf, I've been staying away from most of them so she can have time to sort it out. So I've been quite annoyed with being so antisocial lately. It's hard making new friends when it's your last semester at college and you know any ties you make are probably going to be weakened once you move away. So yeah, not looking for a new gf, not looking for new friends. Either way, rejection is a terrible feeling, and you just need time to heal and lick your wounds. Good luck. (edited by MathOnNapkins on 02-24-05 02:17 AM) |
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Dark Vampriel Lynel "Life is just a dream on the way to death." Level: 57 Posts: 1012/1658 EXP: 1400355 For next: 85573 Since: 08-29-04 From: Somewhere..... Since last post: 2 hours Last activity: 4 min. |
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| Well at least someone knows what I'm going through but even though I'm going to hang out my friends again later on today. I still feel like I did yesterday. I'm losing sleep and not eating much right now. I want to talk to my ex but it's too painful. I can't be angry at him nor hate him because I love him too much to do that. |
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Ran-chan Moldorm eek, when are they going to stop growing... Level: 143  Posts: 7779/12781 EXP: 35293588 For next: 538220 Since: 03-15-04 From: Nerima District, Tokyo - Japan Since last post: 12 hours Last activity: 12 hours |
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| Sorry to hear that you couldn | |||
Reid Hardhat Beetle Level 50 Bitches. Level: 37  Posts: 410/558 EXP: 322182 For next: 16071 Since: 03-15-04 Since last post: 6 days Last activity: 2 hours |
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| Shut up! Maybe if you get a job or if you even bother to go out into the real world, you will see that there are other men you lazy person. EMO SLITTING WRISTS LINKNIN PARK For as long as you think you want a man you will be in this emotional hell hole. YOU DO NOT NEED A MAN TO BE A COMPLETE PERSON. YOU DO NOT NEED CHILDREN TO BE A COMPLETE PERSON. You only need a man if you are willing to give up and let him have whqat he wants eventually. Guys will get bored of talking to "women" online becuase there is no guarantee they are women. A lot of men only have the attention span to see enough ass or boobs or whatever an then move on to the next woman. Wait until you find a guy that will actually amount to something in his lifetime. (edited by Reid on 02-24-05 05:20 PM) |
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Black Lord Level: 34 Posts: 218/453 EXP: 235639 For next: 18012 Since: 03-15-04 From: Nebraska, what's a Nebraska Since last post: 8 days Last activity: 1 day |
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Originally posted by Reid While you make some valid points in that reply, that definately was not the way to go about it. I've had a girl give me the same clause bullshit, saying she didn't really like me that much, yet we both kissed two nights before. At first I was pissed, doing shit uncharacteristic of my ways. Then I got over it, and now I feel I'm a better person then I ever was with her. So... move on with your life, someone will eventually be out there for you. |
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neotransotaku Baby Mario 戻れたら、 誰も気が付く Level: 87 Posts: 2427/4016 EXP: 6220548 For next: 172226 Since: 03-15-04 From: Outside of Time/Space Since last post: 11 hours Last activity: 1 hour |
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| Patience is everything. For me, it's the only thing keeping me going as I wait for the right girl to come. As for the girl side of everything, 90% of guys are jerks while remaining 10% are the ideal ones for you. Probably getting back to topic, I've been the end of "Let's just be friends" many of times. Good guys are the ones that get it and either wait or move on. They are jerks when they don't do it. There isn't much you can do other than to say no and to move on. If he refuses to accept that, then he isn't your friend to begin with and never would have been someone you could ever be with in the end either. So, just be adamant about it and don't give in. If you give in, then it will be a cycle that may be very difficult to break. |
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MathOnNapkins Math n' Hacks Level: 67 Posts: 1493/2189 EXP: 2495887 For next: 96985 Since: 03-18-04 From: Base Tourian Since last post: 1 hour Last activity: 32 min. |
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neo, you should reread the thread I think.  |
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Dark Vampriel Lynel "Life is just a dream on the way to death." Level: 57 Posts: 1019/1658 EXP: 1400355 For next: 85573 Since: 08-29-04 From: Somewhere..... Since last post: 2 hours Last activity: 4 min. |
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| Well being away for a few days from the comp. I can surely say that my friends that I was with, who are a engaged couple, are nuts. Especially, Kellie since she always has to get everything her way with her fiance. Yup if you saw how they act you'd think that they're insane for staying together as well. I hoping for a second chance with him but I know I'll have to wait for it. I can have patience since I love him. |
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Cruel Justice XD Level: 55  Posts: 662/1384 EXP: 1253266 For next: 60923 Since: 03-20-04 From: Darkwoods Penetentiary Since last post: 11 hours Last activity: 7 hours |
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You sound pretty deep, I cannot honestly suggest you make a plan B.  I painfully predicted this would happen eventually and it's terrible to hear that. You should build his anticipation; wait for a week, relax on your own time, then call him. Avoid drinking alcohol, smoking, or doing anything that will further depress you between then. If all goes well, you never know, he may just let you back in. Sure, he's giving you shadows and the cold shoulder but I'm sure he has'nt given up on you yet. Worst comes worst, he'll have another girlfriend. I don't suggest you worry too much but at the same time expect it. Try going out to many different places on your own and you may run into someone else. Keep your chin up, you might get a chance.  |
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Dark Vampriel Lynel "Life is just a dream on the way to death." Level: 57 Posts: 1023/1658 EXP: 1400355 For next: 85573 Since: 08-29-04 From: Somewhere..... Since last post: 2 hours Last activity: 4 min. |
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Cruel Justice I don't smoke or do anything that you suggest that I don't do. I'm being patient for two things right now. Goddamn job search and the second chance.  Jobs are hard to get in this town. |
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Danielle Local Moderator  Level: 76  Posts: 196/3359 EXP: 3958078 For next: 47982 Since: 09-15-04 From: RATE Since last post: 3 hours Last activity: 3 hours |
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| Dont you think it's better that he tells you he just wants to be friends? If he isnt completely positive your relationship will work, he's just being responsible enough to not make things worse further down the road. Im sure he loves you, he just wants to avoid hurting you more than necessary. The fact that he still wants to be in your life should mean something to you.. he cares about you too much to just leave you. There will be other guys who feel differently about being with you as more than friends, just give it time. Be happy that you can call him a friend through everything, ya know? Try not to be down about it, you dont have to have a boyfriend in order to live your life. Good luck, I guess. |
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